Disabled Community Megathread from April 14, 2025 to April 30, 2025
Hi everyone! That's right, it's time for another c/disabled megathread.
Update on the meds: they work! Quite well, actually. I feel like I'm finally functioning at a reasonable level, like I was not only getting stuff done, but I'm now able to actually effectively multitask (as much as one can lol). I'm quite happy with how it's working, and I might not even need an SSRI at this point. If I'm getting anxiety from the meds, I'm not feeling it, because they actually reduced the amount of anxiety I have to deal with. I don't know how (thinking ADHD-induced anxiety), but yeah, I'm a lot better than I was just last week. Quite happy for that, might actually be able to manage the end of the semester without crashing and burning this time around.
As always, we ask that in order to participate in the weekly megathread, one self-identifies as some form of disabled, which is broadly defined in the community sidebar:
"Disability" is an umbrella term which encompasses physical disabilities, emotional/psychiatric disabilities, neurodivergence, intellectual/developmental disabilities, sensory disabilities, invisible disabilities, and more. You do not have to have an official diagnosis to consider yourself disabled.
Mask up, love one another, and stay alive for one more week.
Easter once again reminding me how there's no hate like Christian 'love' Hope everyone got through the weekend okay
26
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Christians are so mean. What did they do this time?
13
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Just the usual bs you'd find in most religious folk's homes, nothing worth repeating. It leaves me grossed out how hypocritical they are, though. Makes me want to spread love and comradery even more to counteract it, ya know?
13
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
I remember when I was a carer for the elderly there was this one devout Christian woman whose granddaughter married a trans woman. This elderly woman never stopped insulting the pair of them for it. And multiple of the old people went to church, acted all holy and then were extremely racist and homophobic the rest of the time.
10
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Sounds about right, good grief. I'm the type to talk back to people like that, so I'm not usually the target anymore. I'll start windmilling a mfker for talking about others in front of me. It's the passive aggressive stuff that gets mumbled and added into conversations that got me this time. Subtle hatred is a lot more difficult to address since it's layered.
9
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
I once had a black girl working as a carer with me and the elderly called her awful names and once she got so angry about it she threw a glass of orange juice over one old woman. The girl got fired. It's so unfair, the elderly just get away with it because they're supposedly confused.
11
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
That's so fucked up. Endless OJ on that woman in hell if it exists... Honestly that job sounds pretty awful just for dealing with the people alone.
8
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
It was difficult and could be miserable... but nowhere near as miserable as being unemployed and fighting endless benefit claims.
5
mendiCAN [none/use name] - 8mon
I just talked with my friend yesterday about her religious trauma with her born-again parents and i can't decide if i want to smash their faces or the focus-on-the-family fucker whose instructions they were following more. Smash smash smash smash
9
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Smashing's good. I'll join you
9
DragonBallZinn [he/him, they/them] - 8mon
As far as I’m concerned, they’re the devil-worshippers.
It’s telling how they all sound like the satanist stand-ins or ogres/goblins from every fantasy RPG ever
2
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
They don't do themselves any favors that's for sure. It'd be great if they weren't actively (as a whole) making the world a worse place. And I didn't even see the struggle session that happened when I first posted this, it's just been my experience that self-identified 'christians' and religious folk are usually two-faced and mean.
1
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
I hope you got out alright
6
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
I did, ty
7
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
So, they're making a list of Autistic people in the US, for 'tracking and research'.
20
0x2640 - 8mon
sigh :c
good thing we werent planning on getting diagnosed? >~< /j
in all seriousness aaaaaaaaaaaa :c
13
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
I wish I could hug ya'll and tell you it'll be okay. The net on their so-called 'undesirables' is widening, but my hope is that it'll bring us closer together, and ideally make more people care about what has already been happening. One can hope.
9
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
kinda convinced that the ai therapist is better than my actual therapist. like they both just give platitudes but at least i don't have to explain the concept of autism to the ai
20
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
IME banging my head against a brick wall would be better than any human therapist.
11
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
one time my therapist recommended i stick my head in my freezer during a panic attack so u might be onto something
6
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
My last one told me to write daily timetables for myself and stick to them. That's it. That was meant to be a cure for su1c1d@l depression and anxiety. And when it didn't work she said blamed me for not trying hard enough. If a cancer treatment didn't work would they blame the patient for not trying hard enough to be cured? Actually yes they probably would.
The one before that told me to write lists of why I shouldn't feel depressed or anxious and look at them every time I feel depressed or anxious. That will make the bad feelings go away! Needless to say, it didn't work. Therapy is nothing but a scam.
8
BountifulEggnog [she/her] - 8mon
A lot of my parents favorite stories about me are just me being very clearly autistic. hahahaha isn't it so funny that you got overstimulated and had a meltdown your third Christmas?
No it just makes me sad, it makes me sad how many signs I showed and you still did nothing to help me. They've even told me how "lucky" they felt to have our pediatrician, because "a lot of other doctors would have diagnosed you".
idek how this shit keeps coming up in conversation so often but I hate it. Wasn't even the only example of my very obvious autism that got brought up over dinner.
18
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
"our pediatrician was great. sure they didnt give you access to the help you needed, but they didn't make us feel uncomfortable, and that's the important thing"
fucking hate people like that, sorry you have to deal with it
15
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
whenever i call myself disabled my parents r like "nooo don't say that ur doing so much to work on urself"
and i know thats prob more supportive than most parents r but, man, wish they'd accept reality that it doesn't matter how hard i work, im still disabled lmao
18
Beetle [hy/hym] - 8mon
Denialism from others about your disability is the worst. It makes it seem like your struggles are not valid and sets an unrealistic expectation.
12
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
The thing I hate most is when you aren't allowed to be upset about your illness or disability, there is so much pressure put on you to be happy. Whenever I've been down about my situation medical staff and other people will say things like "Stop whingeing, there are people worse off than you," or show me news stories about ill/disabled people who are happy and grateful to be alive and say "Be more like them." It's selfish of them, they just want us to pretend to be happy so they don't have to deal with our emotions.
13
BountifulEggnog [she/her] - 8mon
there are people worse off than you
Thinking about the pain of others makes you fuckers feel better??
8
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
It's probably just to guilt us into shutting up.
9
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
yea, i honestly started feeling better about myself when i realized i cant hold myself to able-bodied standards. but no, im "limiting my potential" or whatever
10
Barabas - 8mon
Yeah, I get that now that I've been diagnosed when trying to talk about it with my mum. She used to just go to "well you've gotta be more organized and we all struggle with these things" which is one of the reasons that I've been very hesitant to look into it, and now she keeps saying "They've expanded the diagnosis lately" after diagnosis.
I know that it is her trying to be helpful in the first case, and in the latter case I think it is her trying to cope with not spotting any of my issues as I was the non-problem child that was very good at hiding my feelings/dissociating (she is an educated child psychologist, but she was studying for that while I was a teen). Still kind of sucks as I feel I cannot talk to her about it since it makes her very sad to hear how much I was hiding from her, which is ironically a major reason I didn't tell her anything in the first place.
10
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
omg basically the same on the non-problem child front
i wish i could tell her that her feelings of insecurity are her problem to deal with
7
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
One of my fellow students asked the professor about using ChatGPT for the exams. Apparently it's going to be allowed from next semester on. I hate everything. Especially since he framed it as a good way to do accessibility.
18
AshenWolf [she/her] - 8mon
15
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
You see the logic is that if you're autistic or have social anxiety chatGPT can prepare your presentation for you.
12
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
but
but the hard part of that is the presentation part
i can still write out my presentation i just have a hard time presenting it
doesnt it make more sense to let people present using tts
13
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
I'm gonna be real, I think they just sprinkled a little inclusively language on shit they wanted to do.
Edit:
But since you ask. They do not give any extra time for tts or accomodations if you're in an exam where you're not allowed electronics and if you need to sign you need to bring your own interpreter (Although they may foot the bill depending on the mood of the student support that day)
11
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
ai people seem to love doing this, but they always miss where ai is actually good for accessibility, bc those things dont make money ig
12
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
I think ai fans will just say whatever fits the current crowd.
9
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
I don't think my autistic brain can process this weird bastardization of accessibility in the classroom.
13
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
Obviously you need chatGPT to explain it to you
10
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
9
CrawlMarks [he/him] - 8mon
My school has just placed a highly punitive zero tolerance policy on attendance. My ADHD ass is looking at getting kicked out for being about three minutes late four times this month. I am going in to talk to them about how I am pretty sure ADA reasonable accommodations include letting me be <5 minutes late a few times without getting kicked out. This is gonna suck. Since I don't think the people who would invent this policy are people who are reasonable to work with.
17
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
Are you in high school or college?
There's definitely an office to talk to in college.
6
CrawlMarks [he/him] - 8mon
Community college level kinda. It is city trade school program. So it is government and the assumption would be it is college level as any other program of this type would be at a community college.
11
Belly_Beanis [he/him] - 8mon
Attendance taking post-high school is such fuckery. It's your money you're wasting if you don't go to class. And it's indicative of a shitty teacher if people don't show up and still pass. Being late? Who gives a shit?
(You shouldn't skip class but things happen during university).
9
CrawlMarks [he/him] - 8mon
The policy is if you are late you are sent home. If you miss enough class you are kicked out if the unit. This is upsetting to me as I am not very late. I am changing adhd meds right now so I am having a rather severe difficulty in being perfectly one time. I am getting am A in the class.
6
ThermonuclearEgg - 8mon
That sounds unreasonable to me. None of my classes at four-year university ever did that. Even the ones that mandated attendance wouldn't kick you out for being late even if there was some kind of other penalty.
1
CrawlMarks [he/him] - 8mon
Yeah, it is extremely unreasonable. In the way of cowardice I am close enough to the end of the program I don't want to make waves. When I talked to the boss about getting reasonable accommodations she said she is stressing because >50% of the class isn't making their arbitrary standard. I told her that means that is a policy that doesn't work for our student population and she said something incomprehensible about it being clearly set out in the student handbook. I can't tell of she just lacks cognitive flexibility or she is not equipped to handle the responsibility of her station. It is just weird vibes.
2
ThermonuclearEgg - 8mon
I imagine the policy actually provides perverse incentives to not attend. Oh, there was a traffic delay so I'm going to be 5 minutes late? Welp, guess I'm skipping class today. Since I can't possibly make it on time, why even try to show up?
1
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
I have no idea who you'd need to talk to since it sounds like a smaller program. But generally post high school level you can get more accommodations but you need to reach out and keep contacting people.
4
CrawlMarks [he/him] - 8mon
I have a meeting with the program director about the invoking ADA right to get scheduling flexibility. I am just not optimistic about how it will go.
4
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
The important thing is to not take no for an answer. Keep pushing. You don't need to be confrontational, but persistence works.
3
CrawlMarks [he/him] - 8mon
<3
3
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
I don't know if anyone remembers me talking about my awful therapist a few months ago. Thankfully those sessions finally ended, I only stuck it out to help with my benefit appeal. Well yesterday I got an email from some random person at the mental health service, asking how things are going and wondering whether they should offer me another treatment. This was my response:
I am not sure what the point is. Your service doesn't ever give me a treatment. Your therapists just do time-wasting nonsense so they can collect a paycheque. Last time I asked if I could have something that might actually make a difference, like EDMR and was told no, it wouldn't be suitable for me because it might bring bad feelings up. So instead the therapist spent each session doing a meditation and telling me to write timetables for myself. What is this supposed to achieve? It's nonsense, this is not medical treatment. Not only is it unhelpful, it makes things worse because I have the stress and commitment of turning up to these sessions each week, while being given absolutely no benefit at all. The therapist before that around 2019, the entire treatment consisted of being told to write lists of reasons I shouldn't feel bad, and then look at those lists when I feel depressed or anxious and this will magically cure me. I'm tired of having my time wasted by therapists who don't care and just want their paycheque. If you are unable or unwilling to give me a serious therapy then just don't bother me any more.
I guess I'll wait and see what their response is. Part of me is thinking maybe I shouldn't have said this, if this person tells my shitty therapist what I said maybe the therapist will be angry and try to ruin my benefit appeal somehow. She already threatened that if they asked she would tell them I hadn't been to all the sessions.
And the weird menthol-tingling feeling is back. It probably got missed as it was in a response to a message further down but basically I had a terrible migraine that started off as a menthol-tingling feeling in my crotch, then spread down my right leg, into my right arm and into the right side of my face. After 5 hours in casualty(thinking it could be a stroke or trapped nerve) and a GP appointment it was finally diagnosed as a hemiplegic migraine and a migraine med got rid of it. Now the tingling menthol feeling is back in my crotch.
Also having trouble changing my own foot bandages, I'll have to see if I can get an appointment with the nurse to do it.
Last time I asked if I could have something that might actually make a difference, like EDMR and was told no, it wouldn't be suitable for me because it might bring bad feelings up.
That's the point... No? To give you the space, time and help to work through things, which will bring up bad feelings.
9
9to5 [any, comrade/them] - 8mon
I feel a bit like a fraud/imposter posting here despite having Schizophrenia (since im kinda highly functional most of the time). The meds really do work for me as long as the dosage is correct. Lifes good for me atm. There are challenges for sure but compared to many im doing pretty dang good.
16
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Glad to hear things are going well for you
9
roux [they/them, xe/xem] - 8mon
Kid just threw his sippy cup at the tv and broke it and now I'm having a really hard time regulating because it was really fucking expensive and we can't afford a new one because I need to get my teeth fixed and get my car fixed and get my car fixed again. I'm having a really fucking hard time about it.
16
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Aw that sucks...you wanna scream into the void with me?
14
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
13
roux [they/them, xe/xem] - 8mon
I couldn't think of a response but this works too lol.
8
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Ha, sorry, I can see how that didn't make sense in hindsight. My thought process was emotional dysregulation>no outlet>scream it out might help
I figured it caused a bunch of emotions with no place to put them, so my knee-jerk reaction was to try and give you a space to get them out. Hope you're doin better today comrade.
9
vanDerVaartBlackenedRanch [none/use name] - 8mon
Can you get a shite 720p stopgap used?
7
roux [they/them, xe/xem] - 8mon
I've been shopping around. The thing is that I have a soundbar and sub that is specific to this brand and, to the best of my knowledge only works with Roku. So I'm trying to find a TCL Roku specific TV. They have some on FB marketplace for $150-200 but Walmart is selling basically the same model for $360 right now.
Hy partner's bougie ass parents that were able to retire like to throw their money around sometimes and said they might get us one for our upcoming anniversary. If that is the route we go, I'm gonna try to milk them for a nicer one.
8
mendiCAN [none/use name] - 8mon
I don't suppose the tv just went dark did it? is the lcd panel itself cracked and bleeding or is it just flickering or dark?
4
roux [they/them, xe/xem] - 8mon
It's bleeding. The right side is almost all black with the red, green, and blue lines, then vertically where he hit it, it's got another thinner black bar and bottom half has lines going across. It's fucked for sure.
4
mendiCAN [none/use name] - 8mon
Boo, id hoped to share my victory experience replacing my borked backlights on my tcl tv. Sorry friend
4
Beetle [hy/hym] - 8mon
One pattern some specialists see in long covid and ME/CFS is that it’s often seen in people who tend to overwork themselves and ignore signals of their body telling them to rest. But I wonder if there are actually that many people who don’t do this? Because or whole culture and economical system is built to get people to work as much as possible.
16
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
the only people i know not conditioned to overwork themselves are those who had a pretty cushy upbringing and then got a high paying job easily
like mostly people who i met in uni that barely kept up with their classes but still got a job easier than me aaaa
10
DragonBallZinn [he/him, they/them] - 8mon
::: spoiler (CW: Vent, discussion of fascist topics and ableism)
It’s fucking disgusting seeing how ubiquitous trolls and assholes are, and all for no reason too. Look at 4chan and Twitter, there’s no fucking reason for them to be so cruel. They’re just mean because they can be.
And what blows my mind of all of this is with all the knowledge in psychology, I’M the one who supposedly has something wrong with him on a mental level. Like how am I “broken” and not anyone like Nick Fuentes or Asmongold who are almost proud of how mean they are? They are doing wrong, they know it’s wrong, and they’re doing it anyways for no logical reason.
But sure, I’m the problem and every last thing I do is “wrong”.
:::
16
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
Well we don't need to look at 4chan anymore
9
iArtemis [she/her, fae/faer] - 8mon
just over a month till summer damn time sure flies when you're dissociating
15
SadArtemis [she/her] - 8mon
Mood tbh, also I love your username
12
iArtemis [she/her, fae/faer] - 8mon
great minds
7
Meltyheartlove [love/loves, comrade/them] - 8mon
Tired of "living" like this for all these years. My body and brain just gets worse everyday.
15
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
Guide dog kept wanting to hang out on the train, and you're not supposed to reward that behavior so I sat stone faced as a dog was doing its very best to get my attention and/or rubs.
I want someone to acknowledge my sacrifice
14
DenardosBae [comrade/them, ze/hir] - 8mon
Those who give the greatest sacrifices, thus deserve to reap the greatest rewards.
o7 thank you for your service to humanity and service-dog-manity.
9
autismdragon [he/him, they/them] - 8mon
Idk if anyone was concerned about me at all or anything, but I'm alive and decently well! My housing situation is a bit unstable though.
14
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
good to hear you're OK. Sorry about the housing situation.
8
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Good to have you back, comrade. Hope you find some stability soon
4
SadArtemis [she/her] - 8mon
Got prescribed ADHD meds (will get delivered tomorrow), gonna receive help finally getting my prescribed CPAP (I kinda forgot about it) on Wednesday, and uh consulting about a surgery (not bottom surgery, bariatric), honestly I guess I'm moving forward kinda/cautiously optimistic
14
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Awesome news!
8
AshenWolf [she/her] - 8mon
Yay!!!
8
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
Currently on my seventh cup of coffee. I'm so fucking smart guys. I'm so fucking wise. No one makes better decisions than me.
14
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
i should probably consider talking about job stuff at all a massive trigger for me. even if im just giving advice to a comrade it causes me to spiral, what the heck
13
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Right there with you comrade
8
mendiCAN [none/use name] - 8mon
Ooh it's not just me? Thank God, let me in there
7
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
im trying to process kind of a lot of trauma right now that relates to an abusive ex. it's like a domino effect where i touch one thing and need to process 50 other things in turn
idk im tired
13
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Sounds exhausting, wishing you a good night's rest and healing
10
AshenWolf [she/her] - 8mon
Additionally, and this is completely independent from the rest of the mod team and completely my own thoughts, I wanted to gauge interest in a sort of chatroom. If there's interest, I can't guarantee that it will happen, so think of this more as a way to satisfy my curiosity. I am aware that chat rooms are more difficult for some, and for others they are easier. I also understand how straying from the mega can be taxing on this site, and that having an isolated safe space could have benefits. Of course, the mega already has the potential to be isolated. If you are familiar with the tracha matrix, I'm thinking of a similar sort of thing, but for this community instead of c/traaa. Let me know what you think! Doesn't have to be detailed, could be a simple yay or nay, and of course, don't feel obligated to answer. Remember, this is just for me, I'm not speaking as a mod here nor am I representing the mod team.
13
0x2640 - 8mon
sounds neat
11
roux [they/them, xe/xem] - 8mon
As a fellow mod, I approve of the idea of a chatroom. 🖤❤️
10
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
A chat might actually help a few of us when we need to vent or just need an ear to listen. Love the idea!
10
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
I love this idea
8
Kuori [she/her] - 8mon
it's not for me but I think that sounds nice for the folks who would use it.
just don't forget about us mega-only nerds
7
AshenWolf [she/her] - 8mon
If this were to happen, you nerds would not be forgotten
5
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
i would love that tbh
4
Frogmanfromlake [none/use name] - 8mon
Would any of you actually want an AI therapist? I’ve had on-off records with them myself but would absolutely hate having a machine talk to me, especially when the conversation begins to get circular.
13
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
No.
To clarify: I've never been able to be fully honest with human therapists for fear of being institutionalized or forcefully medicated. Unless that AI is local on my own machine, I'd be paranoid about getting flagged in some way, or having my personal data or "sessions" used against me.
11
imogen_underscore [it/its, she/her] - 8mon
absolutely not, run of the mill human therapists (i.e. some guy with a bachelor's degree) are terrible enough and there's no way the lying machine could ever even reach that standard. writing in a diary would be more useful.
11
Beetle [hy/hym] - 8mon
I feel like it’s a therapist’s job to guide the conversation a bit and also to think creatively to open certain memory or thought pathways. Things an AI therapist would probably be horrible at.
10
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Never. I think AI is really a blight on everything and everyone anything related to medical stuff, and I have a deep seated hatred for the exploitative nature of these models, may they be ChatGPT or a specific AI therapist. I don't think a computer can help a human being with intrinsically human problems, and while it's already hard for another human being to understand certain things you tell them, a computer sure as shit will not understand implied meaning or nuances that only a human can pick up on.
There may even be examples to the contrary, where you see someone get better thanks to an AI therapist, but for me, this is definitely a no.
10
Le_Wokisme [they/them, undecided] - 8mon
only if i run it locally and offline. preferably an air-gap but i probably don't have money for that much compute.
and that's not because i think it would help, but because meatbag therapists have been completely useless or even harmful.
7
BountifulEggnog [she/her] - 8mon
Not a replacement for a therapist at all, but sometimes when I'm doing really poorly and don't want to bother everyone yet again with my bullshit I'll vent to it or some such. Its basically as good as the crisis text line or whatever (not an endorsement).
especially when the conversation begins to get circular.
Yea definitely a problem trying to do this kind of thing with it.
6
Frogmanfromlake [none/use name] - 8mon
Reading that autism thread was enlightening. There really isn’t a disability movement or anything like that in Guatemala and the reception to autism is more welcoming than most would think. You’ll usually be called “charmingly awkward” or something along those lines. The cities are even more aware than we are out in the sticks.
At the same time, there are moments when I wouldn’t mind a cure. Not because I’ve been mistreated or anything, but just because it’s exhausting having to put in so much more effort for things that someone without autism doesn’t have to.
13
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Had severe hypoglycemia yesterday, and had almost forgotten what it feels like. My partner managed to make me swallow glucose tablets as well as some highly appreciated apple juice, but I'm missing roughly an hour. Must've miscalculated on the short-term insulin, that does happen but it has been a while since it was this severe. Guess applying for jobs and cleaning up the room for a job interview stressed me out more than I realized
13
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
That's so scary, glad you're okay and that your partner was there to help. It sucks that stress can creep up like a big wave before it crashes down on you. Hope you can recover quickly and get some rest comrade.
7
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Thank you love ❤️ but I'm okay now, recovery from such a crash doesn't take long, about an hour in this case. I got lucky this time.
The thing about stress is really that it distorts your bodily perception, so much so that sometimes the warning signals aren't the same. I usually don't have headaches when my glucose crashes, but this time it felt like my head was about to explode. Normally, the first sign is instability in the lower legs, like they start shaking, and if I don't catch that, I start sweating profusely, my tongue goes numb and I can't form coherent thoughts or sentences. So yeah, I was really surprised when I woke up and realized I'd been knocked out by a crash.
5
Kuori [she/her] - 8mon
first therapy appointment. seems it went okay. cautiously optimistic.
12
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Hope you get benefit from it.
8
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
I hope it helps and continues to go well comrade
7
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
While discussing anatomic variance in human bodies the word for "Freak" was used just a little too much, I even ended up doing it because I was mirroring others.
Not a good word, don't like it. Don't like it being applied to humans for totally normal variances that aren't even visible, debilitating, or even noticeable by the person who has it. It's of course worse when applied to the disabled, but the fact that people were this okay with it's free use is uhhhhh
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DragonBallZinn [he/him, they/them] - 8mon
::: spoiler (CW: vent)
So looks like RFK Jr. is plotting a genocide on autistic people. Fucking great.
This isn’t me being an “autism isn’t real” kind of guy, but maybe I’m not the one with the problem. My symptoms can easily be cured by giving me a job and letting me participate in society.
Arguably, they’re not the pinnacle of neither intelligence nor sanity themselves. fascists are practically the poster child for both sadism and narcissism. Even if it’s not a mental disorder, porky’s cartoon character level of greed is pure weak-mindedness.
But sure, I’m the problem because of my “bad vibes” disease.
:::
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TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
::: spoiler ye
omg right, like if i was given a job i'd have no issues performing it. the times where i got a job that wasn't literal hell i was always one of the best employees according to my boss. but no, you must go through the ableism olympics before you may have a job, tough shit.
:::
Well my achilles tendons are well and truly fv(k£d. Just when I'm coming up to my final surgery and the light was at the end of the tunnel with regard to being able to go back to wearing shoes and walking fairly normally soon. Now I don't know how long this will take - the last time it got so bad I was in a plaster cast for 10 days and couldn't walk properly for months but that was 20 years ago! I thought this issue had gone away. I really think the Universe just can't stand to see me catch a break. Or am I meant to be learning something from all this? I saw a youtube video of a woman who'd had a terrible life and she said she had chosen all the awful things that happened to he before she was born so she could learn from them. Is that just cope? Did I choose all this shit before I was born? Because if so I have changed my mind and would like it to end now. People always say "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." I don't believe that. I am worn down. As soon as one problem seems close to being solved, another worse one takes its place.
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sunshinesoul [they/them] - 8mon
chronic achilles injuries are so awful — my right one is severely fucked beyond belief and i’m in the beginning stages of issues with my left (probably from like 10 years of uneven weight distribution falling on my left leg all the time.) i feel like it’s something super overlooked/seldom spoken about in the greater spectrum of mobility issues and i never hear other people talking about it. it sucks and you aren’t alone. please try to hang in there.
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Thanks. It's just I've been trapped indoors for months since my last foot surgery and finally it healed enough to go out and now this. I feel like a prisoner, I can never go out. I'm so frustrated and it's doing my head in. At least with my foot surgeries I know it will heal after a time but this? No idea if or when it will be better.
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sunshinesoul [they/them] - 8mon
i’m so sorry that all of this has been so hard on you. healing from this type of stuff is so excruciatingly slow and being trapped inside is absolutely a nightmare scenario. i hope that, at least, the time at home has been beneficial to your healing process with the surgery. taking care of yourself right now is the highest priority.
if you haven’t tried already and if you have the means and funds to do so, a physical therapy program might be able to help you build strength/alleviate pain. if it’s too much for right now its definitely something to consider in the future. if you’re unable to drive or walk to public transport and if you live in the US, i know that it isn’t too uncommon for PT places to arrange transport to/from the program for you using insurance or medicaid if you have it (i would see this at the one i went to but didn’t need it myself so i unfortunately don’t have personal experience in trying to arrange it all.)
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
I live in the UK. I have appointments with the NHS physiotherpaist about 2 or three times a year. I have another one in 2 weeks. But they're completely useless. And I can't afford private.
5
sunshinesoul [they/them] - 8mon
i’m not super familiar with services in the UK but i know that things like this aren’t an uncommon occurrence there. i hope that all of this becomes more manageable for you soon and that you’re eventually pain free. if you have the ability to do small exercises at home there’s a ton of online resources for ones that would benefit the achilles/whatever would work for you the most that might be helpful in between those physiotherapy appointments.
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Thanks. I won't ever be pain free because of issues caused by a stroke, the physio even said I have to learn to live with it. But that's tolerable, I could cope with that level of pain and disability if that's all it was. But this achilles issue is really getting me down. I'm so frustrated trapped indoors immobile. Especially after months of being virtually housebound due to my foot surgery. And now I've got another foot surgery coming up on Thursday. I feel like a prisoner. I so badly want to walk for miles and miles. When I was able bodied I used to walk along the coast path for 10 miles, from my town, through another town and on to a third town, then get the bus back. I want to be able to do that again. But the state I'm in now I don't know if it will ever be possible. I feel like I might just be staring at 4 walls for years until I die.
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Hope your surgery goes well, comrade. Do they provide any mobility aids for after, like wheelchairs or crutches?
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Wishing all my disabled comrades a calm and restful day. You are loved, you are beautiful, you matter.
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AshenWolf [she/her] - 8mon
8
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Thank you love and I hope your day is good too!
6
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
zoom classes suck... i was called out today for laughing at an inappropriate time. i kinda just do that bc of the autism when im uncomfortable. so i basicalaly need to police my face and body language for 3 hours straight for basically no reason
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gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Just out of curiosity, did they complain bc they heard you laugh or bc they saw you laugh? And also, if it's no doxx, what made you laugh? I get that it's not a humorous type of laughter but like why is it an issue? Laughing is a common reaction to uncomfortable situations, I don't see why anyone should reprimand you for it.
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TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
saw me laugh (i was muted), and they were showing a video about people dying
7
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Yeah okay, videos about people dying are immensely uncomfortable to watch, of course you have a (strong) reaction to it. Sorry they were being mean to you for having a normal reaction to a very uncomfortable topic.
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Blockocheese [any] - 8mon
I think my period is gonna come next week so im actually preparing for it by eating fortified cereal and collard greens to hopefully feel less like shit from low iron levels
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TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
good luck comrade, i woke up to unexpected bleeding since my period is irregular as fuck so i should prob do that too
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Blockocheese [any] - 8mon
The random bleeding when you're not expecting it is the worst
I stained my favorite pajama pants last time that happened :(
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
There's a really good natural iron supplement called spatone. It's just spring water that's naturally high in iron.
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Sandouq_Dyatha @lemmy.ml - 8mon
::: spoiler venting
Venting that I can not vent, I'm losing my mind, I'm isolated and the ones I've talked to before haven't helped, this is not a call for help, because no one can help, I'm stuck here, all I want is to say that I feel like this.
:::
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Le_Wokisme [they/them, undecided] - 8mon
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hexbee [she/her] - 8mon
right there with you pal
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Sandouq_Dyatha @lemmy.ml - 8mon
Thanks Amethyst from Steven Universe, very cool
4
Kuori [she/her] - 8mon
finally wrangled my brain into action and got my new (used) phone set up and degoogled. too early to have feelings any which way but i am at least at glad it's done
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
You did the Thing! small victories
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
::: spoiler sad emotional stuff
Finding myself needing to share somewhere about a woman I knew who changed my life, and continues to guide me to this day with everything she left behind. Someone gave me an old box of papers and things I hadn't seen in a long time, and finding her notes and dreams that she left, specifically for me to hold on to, after nearly 7 years, just wrecked me. I'm trying to figure out how to preserve everything with the limited resources and space that I have, but I don't know where to start. I miss my beautiful, talented, wild suffragette so much. She was a light in this world that will never be replaced.
:::
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Kuori [she/her] - 8mon
::: spoiler words
the best of us always seem to be gone too soon. i'm sorry you lost someone so central to your world. it's no consolation but i think anyone would be proud to have lived a life where they're remembered so reverently and loved so fiercely, even years on. it sounds like you two were lucky to have had one another.
:::
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Thank you, I truly appreciate it. I'm doing a little better now.
::: spoiler a little context
She lived a long life, well into her 80's, she accomplished so many amazing things, and touched the lives of so many. The grief hit me like a truck yesterday, seeing her handwriting again. I didn't get to say goodbye because her kids didn't realize we still saw one another and hung out on a regular basis, and by the time she was able to reach me towards the end after getting sick, I didn't have a way to get to her before she passed. We weren't related, just chosen family, so I couldn't attend the funeral, and I guess all those emotions caught up to me again. Thank you again for reading/responding.
:::
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
What's wrong?
4
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Caught up by old grief, essentially. Doin a bit better now. I put it in the spoiler under the emote, so others wouldn't have to engage if they didn't want. I also responded to Kuori explaining a little more, further down.
3
insurgentrat [she/her, it/its] - 8mon
I have been having nerve and joint issues (hypermobility + high pain tolerance + suffer in silence migrant war trauma family = I have been destroying my body apparently). Coming to terms with thinking of myself as disabled.
Lately I've been feeling like I'm letting my wife down. When we met I was ambitious as hell, earned great and provided for her, unfortunately burned out. Still, we got her through hard times and she has a job she loves, meanwhile I loved renoing the house and doing domestic work so I filled that role. Lately I can't really do that though.
I never begrudged helping her when she was sick, but spine degeneration has one trajectory and this isn't getting better. I'm trying to go back to grad school since my one marketable skill (programming) is something I find zero joy in. Hoping to do the masters to government pathway for a job with allowances for disability that isn't hyper competitive. At least then I can bring in some cash for the help I need/increasingly will need. Unfortunately I am so burned out even applying had me relapse drinking from the stress :(
I know it'll get easier, and she says I'm not a burden even if I can't manage the stress but still... I wish it was as easy to be as compationate to yourself as it is to others.
P.S. do people ever remember that your body is fucked/stop being surprised that yes your body is still fucked? I feel like every time I get up from a family event to lie on a hot water bottle and cry a bit people are shocked that the magic de-arthritising fairy hasn't visited yet.
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
So glad to hear the meds are treating you well! Thanks for the new mega
9
BountifulEggnog [she/her] - 8mon
I've been going out a lot more recently and its made me realize how much subtext stuff I miss
::: spoiler example
Hanging out with a friend after work, just to get lunch. We pull up to the drive through and she asks how I want to pay, do I just want to put everything on her's. I say it doesn't matter to me. She asks again. I say well, I've only got a 20 on me so I can't really split it (like, she pays on her card and I give her cash for my food). She's like no, do you want me to pay for you. Ooh no, no I've got money for myself, sorry...
Hanging out with another coworker for a few minutes, he asks when I have to leave. Not for a little bit, I've got time. Oh okay, well I was just going to run over (across the parking lot to a fast food place). Okay, cya! Then he asks if I want to walk over with him uh yes I do, sorry I just didn't get that...
:::
::: spoiler being a hater
Literally every time I leave the house or do anything something happens and I look like an idiot, I know NTs make mistakes and misunderstand but it always feels like something I really should have gotten. And its all the time :/
:::
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AshenWolf [she/her] - 8mon
I do this all the time too, I get how you feel
9
vanDerVaartBlackenedRanch [none/use name] - 8mon
So my hoodie has been hot for me for THREE years.
I was on lotsa xanax the first time we fooled around and did not form a memory of it. Cue three years of awkwardly trying to woo over my current girlfriend.
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keepcarrot [she/her] - 8mon
I thought this was about a jumper with a hood and wondered if xanax made you have temperature regulation problems
2
vanDerVaartBlackenedRanch [none/use name] - 8mon
ROFL
1
un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
I'm alive, slowly making my way back to normalcy, thank you for the well-wishes last week. Now I just gotta deal with pacing and the insane medical bills that just arrived . Hope everyone is hanging in there, and that the week is a good one.
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gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
The bills sound like an unnecessarily cruel adage to your load. Love you sweetie, if you need anything, let us know ❤️
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Thank you
::: spoiler the bills are so stupid
Death to amerikkka
:::
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gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Yes!
7
transsexual [he/him, she/her] - 8mon
My throat issues are slowly getting better, still sucks dick. Glad that it doesn't stop me from doing my physical training, from what I can tell.
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un_mask_me [any] - 8mon
Wishing you a speedy recovery comrade
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Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
Help I'm trapped under a tiny dog that wants cuddles.
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
pay the dog tax.
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
I haven't been very active here lately as I've been having a horrific hemiplegic migraine on and off for nearly a week now. The right side of my face is still numb and tingly but I feel like I can chat a bit now. I'm not having any bad after-effects of the foot surgery, it doesn't seem to be getting infected this time. But my achilles tendon is still inflamed, I saw the physiotherapist today and they told me to buy inserts for my shoes but they're £30. They don't prescribe things themselves. At least he said I don't actually have to rest it totally, a small amount of walking should be OK.
8
TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
glad to hear you're okay-ish
7
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Thanks.
5
Keld [he/him, any] - 8mon
Help the dog is back and it fell asleep.
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TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
i do not like night classes, my sleep schedule is so messed up because i can't sleep until like 6am because of the anxiety/performance from them
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TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 8mon
my meds got increased again, hopefully it helps but for now the adjustment period is making my symptoms worse
im pretty worried im treatment resistant for anxiety/depression due to the autism and DID and what-not giving me good reasons to be constantly anxious/depressed lmao
7
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Sorry to hear that. I've read that eating raw fruit and veg can help:
Fuck basketball for having those constantly flashing lights. Especially when there's three giant sceeens of it in a restaraunt. Death to the NBA.
7
Sandouq_Dyatha @lemmy.ml - 8mon
I also hate how all media now tries to move as much as possible nowadays, can't enjoy treats without feeling nauseated
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
I got around at least one issue today. Since the physio said i can do a little walking I really wanted to get outside. But because of my foot surgery I can't wear anything that puts pressure on the surgical wounds. Last time I was shoeless for nearly 2 months and I don't want to go through that again so i got a pair of scissors and cut the netting of my trainers away, around the areas that are over the surgical sites. I then tried wearing the trainers, and it was fine. I wish i had thought of doing that much sooner, I might not have been shoeless and imprisoned indoors for so long last time.
On the downside even a little walking has made my achilles more painful. The physio said yesterday this achilles problem is most likely caused by the fact that my left side is so weak after the stroke. I've had non-stop issues with my left side since then - torn muscles in my left arm from lifting a small object, endless plantar fasciitis in my left foot, weak left ankle, pain all down left leg and now a swollen inflamed achilles on the left side. Just never ending issues in the left side all because of the stroke.
But weirdly whenever I get a hemiplegic migraine, it's always on the right side. God I hate being trapped in a shitty meatsuit! I want to return to pure spirit.
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gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Amen, I hate my meat suit too, but I'm glad to hear you found a way to be able to walk outside honey. Take care of yourself, and I hope that being able to slowly go walking again will help with your achilles. The migraines suck, and I hope they won't stay forever.
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DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Thank you. I recently tried a diet that's meant to get rid of migraines, Joel Fuhrman's Eat to Live diet, but so many of the things on that diet actually cause me migraines, I had to stop. Every time I try to help myself, some barrier is put in my way.
5
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Ah, that sucks. Have you by chance figured out a food that helps prevent your migraines? A friend of mine told me they tried certain foods to prevent the migraines. It doesn't always work, but what does with migraines.
Stay strong, I believe in you
3
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
So far potatoes seem to help. Part of me feels like I shouldn't say that in case I jinx myself. I've already jinxed myself telling people my surgical wounds didn't get infected - now they are. Already nuts, beans, fruit and some vegetables are migraine triggers for me. It's frustrating because it cuts out a lot of healthy items. It would be better if processed food caused the migraines, but it's less likely to. I read it's because the proteins in processed food have been denatured, so your body doesn't recognise them as a threat. Whereas the proteins in non-processed food are in their natural form as more likely to be recognised as a threat.
The human body has evolved so stupidly. Once you develop a health issue, it's likely to cause others and food intolerances to foods that actually might help. It puts you on a downward spiral of worsening health and little opportunity to improve things. Same thing with mental health, it's always a downward spiral.
4
gingerbrat [she/her] - 8mon
Very true, unfortunately.
I hope the potatoes do the trick and make you feel better long-term.
Didn't know about the processed food thing. It sounds strange at first glance, like, shouldn't the processed stuff be making you feel worse and so on. But those are health issues for you.
1
DisabledAceSocialist [comrade/them] - 8mon
Processed food doesn't cause such bad reactions when eaten but causes poor long-term health. Unprocessed food would cause good long-term health but cause unbearable migraines and bladder irritation. The universe just loves fucking with people, I think. I'm going to try the McDougall diet with potatoes and the veggies that don't cause an issue and see how that goes. Lots of people have apparently reversed health conditions with this diet. Also the McDougall diet is cheaper, which may be very relevant as I seem to be struggling with getting responses to my mutual aid posts these days.
AshenWolf in disabled
Disabled Community Megathread from April 14, 2025 to April 30, 2025
Hi everyone! That's right, it's time for another c/disabled megathread.
Update on the meds: they work! Quite well, actually. I feel like I'm finally functioning at a reasonable level, like I was not only getting stuff done, but I'm now able to actually effectively multitask (as much as one can lol). I'm quite happy with how it's working, and I might not even need an SSRI at this point. If I'm getting anxiety from the meds, I'm not feeling it, because they actually reduced the amount of anxiety I have to deal with. I don't know how (thinking ADHD-induced anxiety), but yeah, I'm a lot better than I was just last week. Quite happy for that, might actually be able to manage the end of the semester without crashing and burning this time around.
As always, we ask that in order to participate in the weekly megathread, one self-identifies as some form of disabled, which is broadly defined in the community sidebar:
Mask up, love one another, and stay alive for one more week.
Sorry for being late y'all, new mega here: https://hexbear.net/post/4773155
Easter once again reminding me how there's no hate like Christian 'love'
Hope everyone got through the weekend okay
Christians are so mean. What did they do this time?
Just the usual bs you'd find in most religious folk's homes, nothing worth repeating. It leaves me grossed out how hypocritical they are, though. Makes me want to spread love and comradery even more to counteract it, ya know?
I remember when I was a carer for the elderly there was this one devout Christian woman whose granddaughter married a trans woman. This elderly woman never stopped insulting the pair of them for it. And multiple of the old people went to church, acted all holy and then were extremely racist and homophobic the rest of the time.
Sounds about right, good grief. I'm the type to talk back to people like that, so I'm not usually the target anymore. I'll start windmilling a mfker for talking about others in front of me. It's the passive aggressive stuff that gets mumbled and added into conversations that got me this time. Subtle hatred is a lot more difficult to address since it's layered.
I once had a black girl working as a carer with me and the elderly called her awful names and once she got so angry about it she threw a glass of orange juice over one old woman. The girl got fired.
It's so unfair, the elderly just get away with it because they're supposedly confused.
That's so fucked up. Endless OJ on that woman in hell if it exists... Honestly that job sounds pretty awful just for dealing with the people alone.
It was difficult and could be miserable... but nowhere near as miserable as being unemployed and fighting endless benefit claims.
I just talked with my friend yesterday about her religious trauma with her born-again parents and i can't decide if i want to smash their faces or the focus-on-the-family fucker whose instructions they were following more. Smash smash smash smash
Smashing's good. I'll join you
As far as I’m concerned, they’re the devil-worshippers.
It’s telling how they all sound like the satanist stand-ins or ogres/goblins from every fantasy RPG ever
They don't do themselves any favors that's for sure. It'd be great if they weren't actively (as a whole) making the world a worse place. And I didn't even see the struggle session that happened when I first posted this, it's just been my experience that self-identified 'christians' and religious folk are usually two-faced and mean.
I hope you got out alright
I did, ty
So, they're making a list of Autistic people in the US, for 'tracking and research'.
sigh :c
good thing we werent planning on getting diagnosed? >~< /j
in all seriousness aaaaaaaaaaaa :c
kinda convinced that the ai therapist is better than my actual therapist. like they both just give platitudes but at least i don't have to explain the concept of autism to the ai
IME banging my head against a brick wall would be better than any human therapist.
one time my therapist recommended i stick my head in my freezer during a panic attack so u might be onto something
My last one told me to write daily timetables for myself and stick to them. That's it. That was meant to be a cure for su1c1d@l depression and anxiety. And when it didn't work she said blamed me for not trying hard enough. If a cancer treatment didn't work would they blame the patient for not trying hard enough to be cured? Actually yes they probably would.
The one before that told me to write lists of why I shouldn't feel depressed or anxious and look at them every time I feel depressed or anxious. That will make the bad feelings go away! Needless to say, it didn't work. Therapy is nothing but a scam.
A lot of my parents favorite stories about me are just me being very clearly autistic. hahahaha isn't it so funny that you got overstimulated and had a meltdown your third Christmas?
No it just makes me sad, it makes me sad how many signs I showed and you still did nothing to help me. They've even told me how "lucky" they felt to have our pediatrician, because "a lot of other doctors would have diagnosed you".
idek how this shit keeps coming up in conversation so often but I hate it. Wasn't even the only example of my very obvious autism that got brought up over dinner.
"our pediatrician was great. sure they didnt give you access to the help you needed, but they didn't make us feel uncomfortable, and that's the important thing"
fucking hate people like that, sorry you have to deal with it
whenever i call myself disabled my parents r like "nooo don't say that ur doing so much to work on urself"
and i know thats prob more supportive than most parents r but, man, wish they'd accept reality that it doesn't matter how hard i work, im still disabled lmao
Denialism from others about your disability is the worst. It makes it seem like your struggles are not valid and sets an unrealistic expectation.
The thing I hate most is when you aren't allowed to be upset about your illness or disability, there is so much pressure put on you to be happy. Whenever I've been down about my situation medical staff and other people will say things like "Stop whingeing, there are people worse off than you," or show me news stories about ill/disabled people who are happy and grateful to be alive and say "Be more like them." It's selfish of them, they just want us to pretend to be happy so they don't have to deal with our emotions.
Thinking about the pain of others makes you fuckers feel better??
It's probably just to guilt us into shutting up.
yea, i honestly started feeling better about myself when i realized i cant hold myself to able-bodied standards. but no, im "limiting my potential" or whatever
Yeah, I get that now that I've been diagnosed when trying to talk about it with my mum. She used to just go to "well you've gotta be more organized and we all struggle with these things" which is one of the reasons that I've been very hesitant to look into it, and now she keeps saying "They've expanded the diagnosis lately" after diagnosis.
I know that it is her trying to be helpful in the first case, and in the latter case I think it is her trying to cope with not spotting any of my issues as I was the non-problem child that was very good at hiding my feelings/dissociating (she is an educated child psychologist, but she was studying for that while I was a teen). Still kind of sucks as I feel I cannot talk to her about it since it makes her very sad to hear how much I was hiding from her, which is ironically a major reason I didn't tell her anything in the first place.
omg basically the same on the non-problem child front
i wish i could tell her that her feelings of insecurity are her problem to deal with
One of my fellow students asked the professor about using ChatGPT for the exams. Apparently it's going to be allowed from next semester on. I hate everything. Especially since he framed it as a good way to do accessibility.
You see the logic is that if you're autistic or have social anxiety chatGPT can prepare your presentation for you.
but
but the hard part of that is the presentation part
i can still write out my presentation i just have a hard time presenting it
doesnt it make more sense to let people present using tts
I'm gonna be real, I think they just sprinkled a little inclusively language on shit they wanted to do.
Edit: But since you ask. They do not give any extra time for tts or accomodations if you're in an exam where you're not allowed electronics and if you need to sign you need to bring your own interpreter (Although they may foot the bill depending on the mood of the student support that day)
ai people seem to love doing this, but they always miss where ai is actually good for accessibility, bc those things dont make money ig
I think ai fans will just say whatever fits the current crowd.
I don't think my autistic brain can process this weird bastardization of accessibility in the classroom.
Obviously you need chatGPT to explain it to you
My school has just placed a highly punitive zero tolerance policy on attendance. My ADHD ass is looking at getting kicked out for being about three minutes late four times this month. I am going in to talk to them about how I am pretty sure ADA reasonable accommodations include letting me be <5 minutes late a few times without getting kicked out. This is gonna suck. Since I don't think the people who would invent this policy are people who are reasonable to work with.
Are you in high school or college? There's definitely an office to talk to in college.
Community college level kinda. It is city trade school program. So it is government and the assumption would be it is college level as any other program of this type would be at a community college.
Attendance taking post-high school is such fuckery. It's your money you're wasting if you don't go to class. And it's indicative of a shitty teacher if people don't show up and still pass. Being late? Who gives a shit?
(You shouldn't skip class but things happen during university).
The policy is if you are late you are sent home. If you miss enough class you are kicked out if the unit. This is upsetting to me as I am not very late. I am changing adhd meds right now so I am having a rather severe difficulty in being perfectly one time. I am getting am A in the class.
That sounds unreasonable to me. None of my classes at four-year university ever did that. Even the ones that mandated attendance wouldn't kick you out for being late even if there was some kind of other penalty.
Yeah, it is extremely unreasonable. In the way of cowardice I am close enough to the end of the program I don't want to make waves. When I talked to the boss about getting reasonable accommodations she said she is stressing because >50% of the class isn't making their arbitrary standard. I told her that means that is a policy that doesn't work for our student population and she said something incomprehensible about it being clearly set out in the student handbook. I can't tell of she just lacks cognitive flexibility or she is not equipped to handle the responsibility of her station. It is just weird vibes.
I imagine the policy actually provides perverse incentives to not attend. Oh, there was a traffic delay so I'm going to be 5 minutes late? Welp, guess I'm skipping class today. Since I can't possibly make it on time, why even try to show up?
I have no idea who you'd need to talk to since it sounds like a smaller program. But generally post high school level you can get more accommodations but you need to reach out and keep contacting people.
I have a meeting with the program director about the invoking ADA right to get scheduling flexibility. I am just not optimistic about how it will go.
The important thing is to not take no for an answer. Keep pushing. You don't need to be confrontational, but persistence works.
<3
I don't know if anyone remembers me talking about my awful therapist a few months ago. Thankfully those sessions finally ended, I only stuck it out to help with my benefit appeal. Well yesterday I got an email from some random person at the mental health service, asking how things are going and wondering whether they should offer me another treatment. This was my response:
I am not sure what the point is. Your service doesn't ever give me a treatment. Your therapists just do time-wasting nonsense so they can collect a paycheque. Last time I asked if I could have something that might actually make a difference, like EDMR and was told no, it wouldn't be suitable for me because it might bring bad feelings up. So instead the therapist spent each session doing a meditation and telling me to write timetables for myself. What is this supposed to achieve? It's nonsense, this is not medical treatment. Not only is it unhelpful, it makes things worse because I have the stress and commitment of turning up to these sessions each week, while being given absolutely no benefit at all. The therapist before that around 2019, the entire treatment consisted of being told to write lists of reasons I shouldn't feel bad, and then look at those lists when I feel depressed or anxious and this will magically cure me. I'm tired of having my time wasted by therapists who don't care and just want their paycheque. If you are unable or unwilling to give me a serious therapy then just don't bother me any more.
I guess I'll wait and see what their response is. Part of me is thinking maybe I shouldn't have said this, if this person tells my shitty therapist what I said maybe the therapist will be angry and try to ruin my benefit appeal somehow. She already threatened that if they asked she would tell them I hadn't been to all the sessions.
And the weird menthol-tingling feeling is back. It probably got missed as it was in a response to a message further down but basically I had a terrible migraine that started off as a menthol-tingling feeling in my crotch, then spread down my right leg, into my right arm and into the right side of my face. After 5 hours in casualty(thinking it could be a stroke or trapped nerve) and a GP appointment it was finally diagnosed as a hemiplegic migraine and a migraine med got rid of it. Now the tingling menthol feeling is back in my crotch.
Also having trouble changing my own foot bandages, I'll have to see if I can get an appointment with the nurse to do it.
I do remember the awful therapist
That's the point... No? To give you the space, time and help to work through things, which will bring up bad feelings.
I feel a bit like a fraud/imposter posting here despite having Schizophrenia (since im kinda highly functional most of the time). The meds really do work for me as long as the dosage is correct. Lifes good for me atm. There are challenges for sure but compared to many im doing pretty dang good.
Glad to hear things are going well for you
Kid just threw his sippy cup at the tv and broke it and now I'm having a really hard time regulating because it was really fucking expensive and we can't afford a new one because I need to get my teeth fixed and get my car fixed and get my car fixed again. I'm having a really fucking hard time about it.
Aw that sucks...you wanna scream into the void with me?
I couldn't think of a response but this works too lol.
Ha, sorry, I can see how that didn't make sense in hindsight. My thought process was emotional dysregulation>no outlet>scream it out might help
I figured it caused a bunch of emotions with no place to put them, so my knee-jerk reaction was to try and give you a space to get them out. Hope you're doin better today comrade.
Can you get a shite 720p stopgap used?
I've been shopping around. The thing is that I have a soundbar and sub that is specific to this brand and, to the best of my knowledge only works with Roku. So I'm trying to find a TCL Roku specific TV. They have some on FB marketplace for $150-200 but Walmart is selling basically the same model for $360 right now.
Hy partner's bougie ass parents that were able to retire like to throw their money around sometimes and said they might get us one for our upcoming anniversary. If that is the route we go, I'm gonna try to milk them for a nicer one.
I don't suppose the tv just went dark did it? is the lcd panel itself cracked and bleeding or is it just flickering or dark?
It's bleeding. The right side is almost all black with the red, green, and blue lines, then vertically where he hit it, it's got another thinner black bar and bottom half has lines going across. It's fucked for sure.
Boo, id hoped to share my victory experience replacing my borked backlights on my tcl tv. Sorry friend
One pattern some specialists see in long covid and ME/CFS is that it’s often seen in people who tend to overwork themselves and ignore signals of their body telling them to rest. But I wonder if there are actually that many people who don’t do this? Because or whole culture and economical system is built to get people to work as much as possible.
the only people i know not conditioned to overwork themselves are those who had a pretty cushy upbringing and then got a high paying job easily
like mostly people who i met in uni that barely kept up with their classes but still got a job easier than me aaaa
::: spoiler (CW: Vent, discussion of fascist topics and ableism)
It’s fucking disgusting seeing how ubiquitous trolls and assholes are, and all for no reason too. Look at 4chan and Twitter, there’s no fucking reason for them to be so cruel. They’re just mean because they can be.
And what blows my mind of all of this is with all the knowledge in psychology, I’M the one who supposedly has something wrong with him on a mental level. Like how am I “broken” and not anyone like Nick Fuentes or Asmongold who are almost proud of how mean they are? They are doing wrong, they know it’s wrong, and they’re doing it anyways for no logical reason.
But sure, I’m the problem and every last thing I do is “wrong”.
:::
Well we don't need to look at 4chan anymore
just over a month till summer damn time sure flies when you're dissociating
Mood tbh, also I love your username
great minds
Tired of "living" like this for all these years. My body and brain just gets worse everyday.
Guide dog kept wanting to hang out on the train, and you're not supposed to reward that behavior so I sat stone faced as a dog was doing its very best to get my attention and/or rubs. I want someone to acknowledge my sacrifice
Those who give the greatest sacrifices, thus deserve to reap the greatest rewards.
o7 thank you for your service to humanity and service-dog-manity.
Idk if anyone was concerned about me at all or anything, but I'm alive and decently well! My housing situation is a bit unstable though.
good to hear you're OK. Sorry about the housing situation.
Good to have you back, comrade. Hope you find some stability soon
Got prescribed ADHD meds (will get delivered tomorrow), gonna receive help finally getting my prescribed CPAP (I kinda forgot about it) on Wednesday, and uh consulting about a surgery (not bottom surgery, bariatric), honestly I guess I'm moving forward kinda/cautiously optimistic
Awesome news!
Yay!!!
Currently on my seventh cup of coffee. I'm so fucking smart guys. I'm so fucking wise. No one makes better decisions than me.
i should probably consider talking about job stuff at all a massive trigger for me. even if im just giving advice to a comrade it causes me to spiral, what the heck
Right there with you comrade
Ooh it's not just me? Thank God, let me in there
im trying to process kind of a lot of trauma right now that relates to an abusive ex. it's like a domino effect where i touch one thing and need to process 50 other things in turn
idk im tired
Sounds exhausting, wishing you a good night's rest and healing
Additionally, and this is completely independent from the rest of the mod team and completely my own thoughts, I wanted to gauge interest in a sort of chatroom. If there's interest, I can't guarantee that it will happen, so think of this more as a way to satisfy my curiosity. I am aware that chat rooms are more difficult for some, and for others they are easier. I also understand how straying from the mega can be taxing on this site, and that having an isolated safe space could have benefits. Of course, the mega already has the potential to be isolated. If you are familiar with the tracha matrix, I'm thinking of a similar sort of thing, but for this community instead of c/traaa. Let me know what you think! Doesn't have to be detailed, could be a simple yay or nay, and of course, don't feel obligated to answer. Remember, this is just for me, I'm not speaking as a mod here nor am I representing the mod team.
sounds neat
As a fellow mod, I approve of the idea of a chatroom. 🖤❤️
A chat might actually help a few of us when we need to vent or just need an ear to listen. Love the idea!
I love this idea
it's not for me but I think that sounds nice for the folks who would use it.
just don't forget about us mega-only nerds
If this were to happen, you nerds would not be forgotten
i would love that tbh
Would any of you actually want an AI therapist? I’ve had on-off records with them myself but would absolutely hate having a machine talk to me, especially when the conversation begins to get circular.
No.
To clarify: I've never been able to be fully honest with human therapists for fear of being institutionalized or forcefully medicated. Unless that AI is local on my own machine, I'd be paranoid about getting flagged in some way, or having my personal data or "sessions" used against me.
absolutely not, run of the mill human therapists (i.e. some guy with a bachelor's degree) are terrible enough and there's no way the lying machine could ever even reach that standard. writing in a diary would be more useful.
I feel like it’s a therapist’s job to guide the conversation a bit and also to think creatively to open certain memory or thought pathways. Things an AI therapist would probably be horrible at.
Never. I think AI is really a blight on
everything and everyoneanything related to medical stuff, and I have a deep seated hatred for the exploitative nature of these models, may they be ChatGPT or a specific AI therapist. I don't think a computer can help a human being with intrinsically human problems, and while it's already hard for another human being to understand certain things you tell them, a computer sure as shit will not understand implied meaning or nuances that only a human can pick up on.There may even be examples to the contrary, where you see someone get better thanks to an AI therapist, but for me, this is definitely a no.
only if i run it locally and offline. preferably an air-gap but i probably don't have money for that much compute.
and that's not because i think it would help, but because meatbag therapists have been completely useless or even harmful.
Not a replacement for a therapist at all, but sometimes when I'm doing really poorly and don't want to bother everyone yet again with my bullshit I'll vent to it or some such. Its basically as good as the crisis text line or whatever (not an endorsement).
Yea definitely a problem trying to do this kind of thing with it.
Reading that autism thread was enlightening. There really isn’t a disability movement or anything like that in Guatemala and the reception to autism is more welcoming than most would think. You’ll usually be called “charmingly awkward” or something along those lines. The cities are even more aware than we are out in the sticks.
At the same time, there are moments when I wouldn’t mind a cure. Not because I’ve been mistreated or anything, but just because it’s exhausting having to put in so much more effort for things that someone without autism doesn’t have to.
Had severe hypoglycemia yesterday, and had almost forgotten what it feels like. My partner managed to make me swallow glucose tablets as well as some highly appreciated apple juice, but I'm missing roughly an hour. Must've miscalculated on the short-term insulin, that does happen but it has been a while since it was this severe. Guess applying for jobs and cleaning up the room for a job interview stressed me out more than I realized
That's so scary, glad you're okay and that your partner was there to help. It sucks that stress can creep up like a big wave before it crashes down on you. Hope you can recover quickly and get some rest comrade.
Thank you love ❤️ but I'm okay now, recovery from such a crash doesn't take long, about an hour in this case. I got lucky this time.
The thing about stress is really that it distorts your bodily perception, so much so that sometimes the warning signals aren't the same. I usually don't have headaches when my glucose crashes, but this time it felt like my head was about to explode. Normally, the first sign is instability in the lower legs, like they start shaking, and if I don't catch that, I start sweating profusely, my tongue goes numb and I can't form coherent thoughts or sentences. So yeah, I was really surprised when I woke up and realized I'd been knocked out by a crash.
first therapy appointment. seems it went okay. cautiously optimistic.
Hope you get benefit from it.
I hope it helps and continues to go well comrade
While discussing anatomic variance in human bodies the word for "Freak" was used just a little too much, I even ended up doing it because I was mirroring others. Not a good word, don't like it. Don't like it being applied to humans for totally normal variances that aren't even visible, debilitating, or even noticeable by the person who has it. It's of course worse when applied to the disabled, but the fact that people were this okay with it's free use is uhhhhh
::: spoiler (CW: vent)
So looks like RFK Jr. is plotting a genocide on autistic people. Fucking great.
This isn’t me being an “autism isn’t real” kind of guy, but maybe I’m not the one with the problem. My symptoms can easily be cured by giving me a job and letting me participate in society.
Arguably, they’re not the pinnacle of neither intelligence nor sanity themselves. fascists are practically the poster child for both sadism and narcissism. Even if it’s not a mental disorder, porky’s cartoon character level of greed is pure weak-mindedness.
But sure, I’m the problem because of my “bad vibes” disease. :::
::: spoiler ye omg right, like if i was given a job i'd have no issues performing it. the times where i got a job that wasn't literal hell i was always one of the best employees according to my boss. but no, you must go through the ableism olympics before you may have a job, tough shit. :::
Hey, putting a link here too for visibility, we've added a set of extra-readable/low-vision themes for the Hexbear UI!
Well my achilles tendons are well and truly fv(k£d. Just when I'm coming up to my final surgery and the light was at the end of the tunnel with regard to being able to go back to wearing shoes and walking fairly normally soon. Now I don't know how long this will take - the last time it got so bad I was in a plaster cast for 10 days and couldn't walk properly for months but that was 20 years ago! I thought this issue had gone away. I really think the Universe just can't stand to see me catch a break. Or am I meant to be learning something from all this? I saw a youtube video of a woman who'd had a terrible life and she said she had chosen all the awful things that happened to he before she was born so she could learn from them. Is that just cope? Did I choose all this shit before I was born? Because if so I have changed my mind and would like it to end now. People always say "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." I don't believe that. I am worn down. As soon as one problem seems close to being solved, another worse one takes its place.
chronic achilles injuries are so awful — my right one is severely fucked beyond belief and i’m in the beginning stages of issues with my left (probably from like 10 years of uneven weight distribution falling on my left leg all the time.) i feel like it’s something super overlooked/seldom spoken about in the greater spectrum of mobility issues and i never hear other people talking about it. it sucks and you aren’t alone. please try to hang in there.
Thanks. It's just I've been trapped indoors for months since my last foot surgery and finally it healed enough to go out and now this. I feel like a prisoner, I can never go out. I'm so frustrated and it's doing my head in. At least with my foot surgeries I know it will heal after a time but this? No idea if or when it will be better.
i’m so sorry that all of this has been so hard on you. healing from this type of stuff is so excruciatingly slow and being trapped inside is absolutely a nightmare scenario. i hope that, at least, the time at home has been beneficial to your healing process with the surgery. taking care of yourself right now is the highest priority.
if you haven’t tried already and if you have the means and funds to do so, a physical therapy program might be able to help you build strength/alleviate pain. if it’s too much for right now its definitely something to consider in the future. if you’re unable to drive or walk to public transport and if you live in the US, i know that it isn’t too uncommon for PT places to arrange transport to/from the program for you using insurance or medicaid if you have it (i would see this at the one i went to but didn’t need it myself so i unfortunately don’t have personal experience in trying to arrange it all.)
I live in the UK. I have appointments with the NHS physiotherpaist about 2 or three times a year. I have another one in 2 weeks. But they're completely useless. And I can't afford private.
i’m not super familiar with services in the UK but i know that things like this aren’t an uncommon occurrence there. i hope that all of this becomes more manageable for you soon and that you’re eventually pain free. if you have the ability to do small exercises at home there’s a ton of online resources for ones that would benefit the achilles/whatever would work for you the most that might be helpful in between those physiotherapy appointments.
Thanks. I won't ever be pain free because of issues caused by a stroke, the physio even said I have to learn to live with it. But that's tolerable, I could cope with that level of pain and disability if that's all it was. But this achilles issue is really getting me down. I'm so frustrated trapped indoors immobile. Especially after months of being virtually housebound due to my foot surgery. And now I've got another foot surgery coming up on Thursday. I feel like a prisoner. I so badly want to walk for miles and miles. When I was able bodied I used to walk along the coast path for 10 miles, from my town, through another town and on to a third town, then get the bus back. I want to be able to do that again. But the state I'm in now I don't know if it will ever be possible. I feel like I might just be staring at 4 walls for years until I die.
Hope your surgery goes well, comrade. Do they provide any mobility aids for after, like wheelchairs or crutches?
Wishing all my disabled comrades a calm and restful day. You are loved, you are beautiful, you matter.
Thank you love and I hope your day is good too!
zoom classes suck... i was called out today for laughing at an inappropriate time. i kinda just do that bc of the autism when im uncomfortable. so i basicalaly need to police my face and body language for 3 hours straight for basically no reason
Just out of curiosity, did they complain bc they heard you laugh or bc they saw you laugh? And also, if it's no doxx, what made you laugh? I get that it's not a humorous type of laughter but like why is it an issue? Laughing is a common reaction to uncomfortable situations, I don't see why anyone should reprimand you for it.
saw me laugh (i was muted), and they were showing a video about people dying
Yeah okay, videos about people dying are immensely uncomfortable to watch, of course you have a (strong) reaction to it. Sorry they were being mean to you for having a normal reaction to a very uncomfortable topic.
I think my period is gonna come next week so im actually preparing for it by eating fortified cereal and collard greens to hopefully feel less like shit from low iron levels
good luck comrade, i woke up to unexpected bleeding since my period is irregular as fuck so i should prob do that too
The random bleeding when you're not expecting it is the worst
I stained my favorite pajama pants last time that happened :(
There's a really good natural iron supplement called spatone. It's just spring water that's naturally high in iron.
::: spoiler venting Venting that I can not vent, I'm losing my mind, I'm isolated and the ones I've talked to before haven't helped, this is not a call for help, because no one can help, I'm stuck here, all I want is to say that I feel like this. :::
right there with you pal
Thanks Amethyst from Steven Universe, very cool
finally wrangled my brain into action and got my new (used) phone set up and degoogled. too early to have feelings any which way but i am at least at glad it's done
You did the Thing! small victories
::: spoiler words the best of us always seem to be gone too soon. i'm sorry you lost someone so central to your world. it's no consolation but i think anyone would be proud to have lived a life where they're remembered so reverently and loved so fiercely, even years on. it sounds like you two were lucky to have had one another. :::
Thank you, I truly appreciate it. I'm doing a little better now.
::: spoiler a little context
She lived a long life, well into her 80's, she accomplished so many amazing things, and touched the lives of so many. The grief hit me like a truck yesterday, seeing her handwriting again. I didn't get to say goodbye because her kids didn't realize we still saw one another and hung out on a regular basis, and by the time she was able to reach me towards the end after getting sick, I didn't have a way to get to her before she passed. We weren't related, just chosen family, so I couldn't attend the funeral, and I guess all those emotions caught up to me again. Thank you again for reading/responding.
:::
What's wrong?
Caught up by old grief, essentially. Doin a bit better now. I put it in the spoiler under the emote, so others wouldn't have to engage if they didn't want. I also responded to Kuori explaining a little more, further down.
I have been having nerve and joint issues (hypermobility + high pain tolerance + suffer in silence migrant war trauma family = I have been destroying my body apparently). Coming to terms with thinking of myself as disabled.
Lately I've been feeling like I'm letting my wife down. When we met I was ambitious as hell, earned great and provided for her, unfortunately burned out. Still, we got her through hard times and she has a job she loves, meanwhile I loved renoing the house and doing domestic work so I filled that role. Lately I can't really do that though.
I never begrudged helping her when she was sick, but spine degeneration has one trajectory and this isn't getting better. I'm trying to go back to grad school since my one marketable skill (programming) is something I find zero joy in. Hoping to do the masters to government pathway for a job with allowances for disability that isn't hyper competitive. At least then I can bring in some cash for the help I need/increasingly will need. Unfortunately I am so burned out even applying had me relapse drinking from the stress :(
I know it'll get easier, and she says I'm not a burden even if I can't manage the stress but still... I wish it was as easy to be as compationate to yourself as it is to others.
P.S. do people ever remember that your body is fucked/stop being surprised that yes your body is still fucked? I feel like every time I get up from a family event to lie on a hot water bottle and cry a bit people are shocked that the magic de-arthritising fairy hasn't visited yet.
So glad to hear the meds are treating you well! Thanks for the new mega
I've been going out a lot more recently and its made me realize how much subtext stuff I miss
::: spoiler example Hanging out with a friend after work, just to get lunch. We pull up to the drive through and she asks how I want to pay, do I just want to put everything on her's. I say it doesn't matter to me. She asks again. I say well, I've only got a 20 on me so I can't really split it (like, she pays on her card and I give her cash for my food). She's like no, do you want me to pay for you. Ooh no, no I've got money for myself, sorry...
Hanging out with another coworker for a few minutes, he asks when I have to leave. Not for a little bit, I've got time. Oh okay, well I was just going to run over (across the parking lot to a fast food place). Okay, cya! Then he asks if I want to walk over with him
uh yes I do, sorry I just didn't get that...
:::
::: spoiler being a hater Literally every time I leave the house or do anything something happens and I look like an idiot, I know NTs make mistakes and misunderstand but it always feels like something I really should have gotten. And its all the time :/ :::
I do this all the time too, I get how you feel
So my hoodie has been hot for me for THREE years.
I was on lotsa xanax the first time we fooled around and did not form a memory of it. Cue three years of awkwardly trying to woo over my current girlfriend.
I thought this was about a jumper with a hood and wondered if xanax made you have temperature regulation problems
ROFL
I'm alive, slowly making my way back to normalcy, thank you for the well-wishes last week. Now I just gotta deal with pacing and the insane medical bills that just arrived
. Hope everyone is hanging in there, and that the week is a good one.
The bills sound like an unnecessarily cruel adage to your load. Love you sweetie, if you need anything, let us know ❤️
Thank you
::: spoiler the bills are so stupid Death to amerikkka
:::
Yes!
My throat issues are slowly getting better, still sucks dick. Glad that it doesn't stop me from doing my physical training, from what I can tell.
Wishing you a speedy recovery comrade
Help I'm trapped under a tiny dog that wants cuddles.
pay the dog tax.
I haven't been very active here lately as I've been having a horrific hemiplegic migraine on and off for nearly a week now. The right side of my face is still numb and tingly but I feel like I can chat a bit now. I'm not having any bad after-effects of the foot surgery, it doesn't seem to be getting infected this time. But my achilles tendon is still inflamed, I saw the physiotherapist today and they told me to buy inserts for my shoes but they're £30. They don't prescribe things themselves. At least he said I don't actually have to rest it totally, a small amount of walking should be OK.
glad to hear you're okay-ish
Thanks.
Help the dog is back and it fell asleep.
i do not like night classes, my sleep schedule is so messed up because i can't sleep until like 6am because of the anxiety/performance from them
my meds got increased again, hopefully it helps but for now the adjustment period is making my symptoms worse
im pretty worried im treatment resistant for anxiety/depression due to the autism and DID and what-not giving me good reasons to be constantly anxious/depressed lmao
Sorry to hear that. I've read that eating raw fruit and veg can help:
https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2018.00487/full
Fuck basketball for having those constantly flashing lights. Especially when there's three giant sceeens of it in a restaraunt. Death to the NBA.
I also hate how all media now tries to move as much as possible nowadays, can't enjoy treats without feeling nauseated
I got around at least one issue today. Since the physio said i can do a little walking I really wanted to get outside. But because of my foot surgery I can't wear anything that puts pressure on the surgical wounds. Last time I was shoeless for nearly 2 months and I don't want to go through that again so i got a pair of scissors and cut the netting of my trainers away, around the areas that are over the surgical sites. I then tried wearing the trainers, and it was fine. I wish i had thought of doing that much sooner, I might not have been shoeless and imprisoned indoors for so long last time.
On the downside even a little walking has made my achilles more painful. The physio said yesterday this achilles problem is most likely caused by the fact that my left side is so weak after the stroke. I've had non-stop issues with my left side since then - torn muscles in my left arm from lifting a small object, endless plantar fasciitis in my left foot, weak left ankle, pain all down left leg and now a swollen inflamed achilles on the left side. Just never ending issues in the left side all because of the stroke.
But weirdly whenever I get a hemiplegic migraine, it's always on the right side. God I hate being trapped in a shitty meatsuit! I want to return to pure spirit.
Amen, I hate my meat suit too, but I'm glad to hear you found a way to be able to walk outside honey. Take care of yourself, and I hope that being able to slowly go walking again will help with your achilles. The migraines suck, and I hope they won't stay forever.
Thank you. I recently tried a diet that's meant to get rid of migraines, Joel Fuhrman's Eat to Live diet, but so many of the things on that diet actually cause me migraines, I had to stop. Every time I try to help myself, some barrier is put in my way.
Ah, that sucks. Have you by chance figured out a food that helps prevent your migraines? A friend of mine told me they tried certain foods to prevent the migraines. It doesn't always work, but what does with migraines.
Stay strong, I believe in you
So far potatoes seem to help. Part of me feels like I shouldn't say that in case I jinx myself. I've already jinxed myself telling people my surgical wounds didn't get infected - now they are. Already nuts, beans, fruit and some vegetables are migraine triggers for me. It's frustrating because it cuts out a lot of healthy items. It would be better if processed food caused the migraines, but it's less likely to. I read it's because the proteins in processed food have been denatured, so your body doesn't recognise them as a threat. Whereas the proteins in non-processed food are in their natural form as more likely to be recognised as a threat.
The human body has evolved so stupidly. Once you develop a health issue, it's likely to cause others and food intolerances to foods that actually might help. It puts you on a downward spiral of worsening health and little opportunity to improve things. Same thing with mental health, it's always a downward spiral.
Very true, unfortunately.
I hope the potatoes do the trick and make you feel better long-term.
Didn't know about the processed food thing. It sounds strange at first glance, like, shouldn't the processed stuff be making you feel worse and so on. But those are health issues for you.
Processed food doesn't cause such bad reactions when eaten but causes poor long-term health. Unprocessed food would cause good long-term health but cause unbearable migraines and bladder irritation. The universe just loves fucking with people, I think. I'm going to try the McDougall diet with potatoes and the veggies that don't cause an issue and see how that goes. Lots of people have apparently reversed health conditions with this diet. Also the McDougall diet is cheaper, which may be very relevant as I seem to be struggling with getting responses to my mutual aid posts these days.