Girls don’t break wind, they shatter it, and that’s why they’re breathtaking. That’s what my grandfather always used to say, until my grandmother stabbed him to death during a mental episode. Would have been funny if she suffocated him, but she didn’t seem to consider my need for irony
122
EddoWagt @feddit.nl - 1.1yr
This was not a comment I expected to read on this post
47
ailourobor0s - 1.1yr
25
whaleross @lemmy.world - 1.1yr
Still a better love story than Twilight.
8
latenightnoir @lemmy.world - 1.1yr
I hope it's because she ate an onion-heavy dish🥰
33
Kit - 1.1yr
Bro what
10
latenightnoir @lemmy.world - 1.1yr
Onions are good AND good for you! Sure, they fuel a low-to-medium risk biological agent when digested in sufficient quantities, but it's still better than eggy farts!:)))
10
Magnus the Punk Cat - 1.1yr
I wish she would come and fart in my bed instead
27
Kit - 1.1yr
I knew he was the one when we started laughing at eachother's nighttime farts.
22
SkyezOpen @lemmy.world - 1.1yr
My girlfriend said she knew when I opened the shower curtain and used my dick as a catapult to launch water at her.
4
Kit - 1.1yr
Relationship goals
1
Mr_Blott @feddit.uk - 1.1yr
Farting *then lifting the edge of the duvet for a quick huff
17
aeronmelon @lemmy.world - 1.1yr
Like hell I’m going to let the girl of my dreams outfart me. The bedroom is going to be a hazmat crisis before I relent!
17
🐝bownage [they/he] - 1.1yr
One time my wife farted herself awake, you can't not laugh at that
17
qyron - 1.1yr
And that's fine.
16
aeharding @vger.social - 1.1yr
The girl of my dreams doesn’t know how to remove oligosaccharides making food 🤔
9
socsa - 1.1yr
I can fix her
8
Feydaikin - 1.1yr
I would be as well, but I have to settle for farting at work at this moment.
Track_Shovel in 196
Soulmate rule
Girls don’t break wind, they shatter it, and that’s why they’re breathtaking. That’s what my grandfather always used to say, until my grandmother stabbed him to death during a mental episode. Would have been funny if she suffocated him, but she didn’t seem to consider my need for irony
This was not a comment I expected to read on this post
Still a better love story than Twilight.
I hope it's because she ate an onion-heavy dish🥰
Bro what
Onions are good AND good for you! Sure, they fuel a low-to-medium risk biological agent when digested in sufficient quantities, but it's still better than eggy farts!:)))
I wish she would come and fart in my bed instead
I knew he was the one when we started laughing at eachother's nighttime farts.
My girlfriend said she knew when I opened the shower curtain and used my dick as a catapult to launch water at her.
Relationship goals
Farting *then lifting the edge of the duvet for a quick huff
Like hell I’m going to let the girl of my dreams outfart me. The bedroom is going to be a hazmat crisis before I relent!
One time my wife farted herself awake, you can't not laugh at that
And that's fine.
The girl of my dreams doesn’t know how to remove oligosaccharides making food 🤔
I can fix her
I would be as well, but I have to settle for farting at work at this moment.