Breaking news! The actual reason why Syria fell has just been released to the public
It's because the Lion was a gamer all along.
I really hope the curse of Assad won't strike me down for this blasphemy.
context [fae/faer, fae/faer] - 2mon
who must pokemon go?
43
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
25
Belly_Beanis [he/him] - 2mon
To the polls!
10
context [fae/faer, fae/faer] - 2mon
pokemon go to the polls!
who must pokemon go?
the hexbear emoji collection really is a beautiful thing
8
peeonyou [he/him] - 2mon
"reportedly" addicted to video games
reported by me making this up just now as i say reportedly
26
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
He's just the latest in a long line of millenials, zoomers, and whatever the heck we call the new kids on the block after zoomers to hate on to declare has become completely addicted to video games and is causing X moral panick
13
blunder [he/him] - 2mon
Literally
25
hexaflexagonbear [he/him] - 2mon
What does the lion of Damascus think of the chapo MGS miniseries.
24
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
You know, now might actually be the time to ask him now that he's retired.
20
Hestia [she/her, fae/faer] - 2mon
I hope he enjoys his... Retirement....
Running a country sounds awful. I'm glad he has the option to kick back and relax a bit more
22
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
Depends on the game I think. Apex or fortnight might spike ones bloodpressure more than running a country methinks
13
Hestia [she/her, fae/faer] - 2mon
I wonder what his favorite gamer word is
10
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
Probably some variation of y'allah depending on the situation
14
newacctidk [none/use name] - 2mon
Probably gonna be some slur for Assyrians or something
7
BurgerPunk [he/him, comrade/them] - 2mon
What else is he supposed to do in his retirement? Post lists to appear relatable/relevant?
21
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
You'd think he'd try being a grifter "president in exile giving speechs for a few grand" or something like the many American goons and puppets, but it's surprising he's just doing his own thing now.
17
Keld [he/him, any] - 2mon
The difference is twofold. The first is that those American compradors, puppets and goons are selling something an American audience wants. Usually neoliberal economics and "democracy" in the form of allowing American cutout NGOs to run things. Assad is the face of a movement whose chief successful politics are secular Arab nationalism and nationalising resource extraction industries. Do you think there is much of a receptive audience among the political and social elite in Russia?
Which leads to the second thing. Assad was very clearly given a deal of don't get involved in politics and don't make a spectacle of yourself and you get to stay here by Putin, and going on a lecture tour is the opposite of that.
11
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
Would the deal hold if he starts a vtuber twitch channel and became twitch famous?
8
Keld [he/him, any] - 2mon
I think he'd have to go on kick
7
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
Those damn communists hate freedom to stream on twitch
6
WildWeezing420 [he/him] - 2mon
no phones in sight, just living in the moment
7
la_tasalana_intissari_mata [comrade/them] - 2mon
he's currently replaying the demascus steel mission at legendary difficulty because he keeps killing Wahid
19
WildWeezing420 [he/him] - 2mon
they're still using xbox 360 stock photos in 2025 lol
18
Nakoichi [they/them] - 2mon
Should've used this one. Remember this behemoth?
13
Skeleton_Erisma [they/them, any] - 2mon
"now that im no longer president of Syria I can spend my free time playing cities: skylines"
-Assad, Probably
16
abc [he/him, comrade/them] - 2mon
we are reposting posts that were last posted two days ago. our admins are SHIT
12
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
Yeah they suck!
RIGHT TO POST! RIGHT TO POST!
11
abc [he/him, comrade/them] - 2mon
oh shit someone shot you in the head while we were having sex I'm pretty sure it was another corporate spy after me so I'm gonna get my friends to hog tie you in a tree so the cops investigate and get the heat off my back once a scab always a scab
10
Alaskaball [comrade/them, any] - 2mon
WHY ABC, ABC MY GOOD MAN! Having sex would BREAK my volcel pledge I made to the workers I REPRESENT! It is UNFA-thomably RUDE to say that about an UP-standing person such as myself!
Now please, let us converse in a civilized manner, as equals. Take a seat -- I insist.
11
lil_tank [any, he/him] - 2mon
Ah yes, Xbox 360 controller
11
ThermonuclearEgg - 2mon
Much better than Joycon drift
3
BadTakesHaver [he/him, they/them] - 2mon
what are his thoughts on Silksong
10
GoodGuyWithACat [he/him] - 2mon
What is he playing? Russians love those tactical shooters right.
9
vovchik_ilich [he/him] - 2mon
I want to believe I've encountered him in War Thunder lobbies, he probs plays China
6
abc [he/him, comrade/them] - 2mon
he definitely plays USSR even though every fucking plane has like 0 ammo, 0 speed, and 100 armor plates
Alaskaball in main
Breaking news! The actual reason why Syria fell has just been released to the public
It's because the Lion was a gamer all along.
I really hope the curse of Assad won't strike me down for this blasphemy.
To the polls!
the hexbear emoji collection really is a beautiful thing
"reportedly" addicted to video games
reported by me making this up just now as i say reportedly
He's just the latest in a long line of millenials, zoomers, and whatever the heck we call the new kids on the block after zoomers to hate on to declare has become completely addicted to video games and is causing X moral panick
Literally
What does the lion of Damascus think of the chapo MGS miniseries.
You know, now might actually be the time to ask him now that he's retired.
I hope he enjoys his... Retirement....
Running a country sounds awful. I'm glad he has the option to kick back and relax a bit more
Depends on the game I think. Apex or fortnight might spike ones bloodpressure more than running a country methinks
I wonder what his favorite gamer word is
Probably some variation of y'allah depending on the situation
Probably gonna be some slur for Assyrians or something
What else is he supposed to do in his retirement? Post lists to appear relatable/relevant?
You'd think he'd try being a grifter "president in exile giving speechs for a few grand" or something like the many American goons and puppets, but it's surprising he's just doing his own thing now.
The difference is twofold. The first is that those American compradors, puppets and goons are selling something an American audience wants. Usually neoliberal economics and "democracy" in the form of allowing American cutout NGOs to run things. Assad is the face of a movement whose chief successful politics are secular Arab nationalism and nationalising resource extraction industries. Do you think there is much of a receptive audience among the political and social elite in Russia?
Which leads to the second thing. Assad was very clearly given a deal of don't get involved in politics and don't make a spectacle of yourself and you get to stay here by Putin, and going on a lecture tour is the opposite of that.
Would the deal hold if he starts a vtuber twitch channel and became twitch famous?
I think he'd have to go on kick
Those damn communists hate freedom to stream on twitch
no phones in sight, just living in the moment
he's currently replaying the demascus steel mission at legendary difficulty because he keeps killing Wahid
they're still using xbox 360 stock photos in 2025 lol
Should've used this one. Remember this behemoth?
"now that im no longer president of Syria I can spend my free time playing cities: skylines"
-Assad, Probably
we are reposting posts that were last posted two days ago. our admins are SHIT
Yeah they suck!
RIGHT TO POST! RIGHT TO POST!
oh shit someone shot you in the head while we were having sex I'm pretty sure it was another corporate spy after me so I'm gonna get my friends to hog tie you in a tree so the cops investigate and get the heat off my back
once a scab always a scab
WHY ABC, ABC MY GOOD MAN! Having sex would BREAK my volcel pledge I made to the workers I REPRESENT! It is UNFA-thomably RUDE to say that about an UP-standing person such as myself!
Now please, let us converse in a civilized manner, as equals. Take a seat -- I insist.
Ah yes, Xbox 360 controller
Much better than Joycon drift
what are his thoughts on Silksong
What is he playing? Russians love those tactical shooters right.
I want to believe I've encountered him in War Thunder lobbies, he probs plays China
he definitely plays USSR even though every fucking plane has like 0 ammo, 0 speed, and 100 armor plates