Shabby Lemmy

1.0yr

242

Disaster_of_Passion in traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

LANCER - Trans Megathread for July 7th through July 13th, 2025

LANCER is a ttrpg system originally released in November 2019, with a second edition released in July 2024.

A self-described "mix of gritty, mud-and-lasers military science fiction and mythic science fantasy," players are the titular Lancers - skilled mech pilots navigating the aftermath of a 30 year long galactic civil war. Although the resultant Union Third Committee ostensibly keeps the peace, conflict still brews as the massively powerful Corpo-States attempt to expand their territory and influence.

There's a lot more lore than that, but frankly it's unimportant because the only part of LANCER that most people care about are, of course, THE MECHS.

Lancers gain access to their mechs via manufacturer licenses (represented with License Levels, or LL), which give them access to advanced software and design files to construct Mech Frames, equipment, and systems via hyper-advanced 3D printing terminals. Manufacturers differ greatly in both aesthetics and functionality, with each specializing in a particular battlefield role.

The five manufacturers are:

::: spoiler General Massive Systems (GMS) GMS is a nationalized corporate manufacturer which produces a wide variety of universally accessible goods. Their Mech Frames and equipment are immediately available to all Lancers at LL0, and their versatillity is such that they can remain powerful even into the end-game. GMS Frames (the Everest, Sagarmatha, and Chomolungma) are all named after the highest peak on Earth. There is no official art of the GMS Frames, in order to represent their universality and high level of customizability. :::

::: spoiler Interplanetary Shipping Northstar (IPS-N) As their name suggests, IPS-N specializes in interstellar shipping and transportation, producing spaceships, space suits, and related tools and weaponry systems. Mech Frames from IPS-N are designed to be tough and sturdy, often focusing on the close-quarters combat encountered when defending a ship from boarding parties. However, this design also makes them a favourite of space pirates. IPS-N frames have a gritty diesel-punk and military aesthetic, and are named after famous pirates and naval officers (e.g. the Drake, the Blackbeard, and the Raleigh) :::

::: spoiler Smith-Shimano Corp (SSC) Smith-Shimano Core specializes in hi-tech body modifications, working with both gene-splicing and cybernetics. They often cultivate human colonies, which also leads them to produce consumer goods. SSC Mech frames are sleek and advanced, often being highly mobile and carrying powerful weapon systems and hacking software while sacrificing durability. SSC frames are named after various moths and butterflies, such as the Dusk Wing, the Death's Head, and the Viceroy (my personal favourite mech in LANCER). :::

::: spoiler Harrison Armory (HA) Raytheon in space. Harrison Armory are a military weapons and materiel manufacturer and focus primarily on violently colonizing to expand their own territory. HA mech frames are giant metal boxes designed to carry maximum firepower, often reaching heat levels that threaten reactor meltdowns in order to generate more destructive force. They are named after famous warlords such as the Saladin, the Genghis, and the Barbarossa. :::

::: spoiler HORUS Unlike the other manufacturers, HORUS is not a corporation but rather a loose collective of rebels, hacktivists, and iconoclasts ostensibly under the direction of the supernatural Unshackled AI God RA. HORUS does not have uniform mech frame designs, instead having informal "Pattern Groups" used to short-hand describe a HORUS mech's general capabilities. HORUS mechs make use of borderline supernatural technologies such as blinkspace, nano-machine swarms, quantum entanglement, and even time travel to hack and disrupt enemy mechs and control the battlefield. HORUS pattern groups are named after mythological creatures, such as the Kobold (my second fave LANCER mech), the Pegasus, and the Balor. :::

::: spoiler Me yapping about my favourite mech frames and builds I mentioned above my favourite mech frame is the SSC Viceroy. In addition to just looking very cool, it has some really fun mechanics. The Viceroy is a variant frame for the SSC Monarch. While the Monarch is a long range artillery platform with access to some of the most powerful missile launchers and a missile barrage ability, the Viceroy turns this on its head and is a close-quarters mech. All missile launchers equipped to a Viceroy gain a CQB profile allowing them to be used effectively at short range, and the Viceroy's missile barrage targets all enemies in a circle around it. I like to equip a Viceroy with knockback weapons, whose forced movement can trigger Overwatch from your Launchers, allowing you to get essentially free attacks each turn with powerful weapons.

I also mentioned the HORUS Kobold, which has lore that I really enjoy. The original Kobolds were powersuits used for mining, that had HORUS tech uploaded to them to facilitate a worker's rebellion. The Kobold license has a large focus around environmental manipulation. Its weapons and systems allow you to create obstacles using slag cannons, destroy fortification with seismic demolition charges, and flashfry the hulls of enemy mechs causing them to spew molten metal around them. The slag cannons combo really well with the Siege Specialist pilot talent, which allows you to destroy terrain and deal damage in an area around it.

A third fave of mine is the HORUS Rat King. The Rat King is quantumly entangled with any drones it deploys, allowing it to shoot from their position and redirect damage to entangled drones. With the Rat King, you can sacrifice hit points to deploy a drone with a copy of your main weapon. I like to use the default GMS Assault Rifle here, which deals a small amount of guaranteed damage even on a miss, in order to fire massive barrages of consistent guaranteed damage. :::

So, uh, yeah, that's LANCER I guess. It's a ttrpg with very cool mechs that do fun and cool things and I recommend checking it out just for that! All of the artwork is also really amazing and I definitely encourage checking out more of it as well.

I'd love to hear about everyone's favourite mechs or robots from any media!

Join our public Matrix server!

https://matrix.to//#/#tracha-space:transfem.dev

https://rentry.co/tracha#tracha-rooms

As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.

Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.

Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.

sodium_nitride (7/14 - 7/20) peanutbuttercupola* (7/21 - 7/27) BountifulEggnog* (7/28 - 8/3) oscardejarjayes* (8/4 - 8/10) Seryph (8/11 - 8/17) Shaleesh (8/18 - 8/24) GayTuckerCarlson* (8/25 - 8/31) Eco* (9/1 - 9/7) nemmybun (9/8 - 9/14) Disaster_of_Passion* (9/15 - 9/21) Carcharodonna* (9/22 - 9/28)

GenderIsOpSec [she/her, kit/kit's] - 1.0yr

hm well, here goes.

For finished games, stuff that I've personally enjoyed:

The Wayhaven Chronicles: The premier vampire dating simulator, with some story on the side. Urban fantasy stuff. Morgan my beloved catgirl-heart book four is currently being written.

Fallen Hero: Rebirth Superhero stuff, you are a villain though. One of the earliest excellent trans experiences in these games. USSR still exists I think, USA was literally split apart by an earthquake, it's pretty neat. Book three is currently in early alpha.

I, the Forgotten One Ok so you were born as a bastard to a vaguely polish presenting fantasy kingdom, you were sent to southern parts of the country to fight in fantasy Vietnam (on the Vietnamese side) as 15 year old, and you're understandably a very normal person afterwards. Anyways, there's a civil war in Fantasy Poland now and you gotta end it. No lesbian romance, book two is going to have one though I've heard.

The Passenger So uh, you were an cthulhu esque eldritch god and as a last ditch resort before being eaten by another you jumped into a baby about to be born. Urban fantasy horror style. You can date a single mom! Lead a cult! Eat other gods. It's a fun time.

More over here

Now if you want to join me in the purgatory that is waiting here's a couple of WIPs.

Lightweaver: Chosen Basically Avatar (of the bending fame), the main character is all kinds of fucked up and the premise seems good. The writing is also solid.

Drink Your Villain Juice! Superhero slop, more horror themed this time around. I think it's the only game thus far that has let me flirt with someone while they're trying to fix a gaping hole that someone punched into my stomach, so that's pretty good. Basically read this whole thing in a day or two, it's very good.

INFAMOUS You're the singer in a band! You can customise pretty much the whole thing, so you can live up your RATM fantasies, you can also write the songs that you sing if you really want to. You're basically in one of these reality TV "battle of the bands"-show with the producers trying to create drama around you and your band constantly for the ratings. It's good. You can muscle your way into a poly with a movie star and a pop star.

The Bastard of Camelot Arthurian Legend stuff, you're Mordred, the "Black Knight" who is guided by prophecy to be the one to destroy Camelot blaablaa yeah you also get a dragon buddy! Also you have a crybaby stat because basically all problems you face give you the option to cry, and it's glorious. The first three chapters just got a rewrite but they arent on the public demo yet.

gaystyleJoker [she/her] - 1.0yr

hi, does anyone wanna make the mega in the upcoming weeks? if so, reply to this post and i'll add you to the list!

the list as it stands:

* after name denotes someone who has posted before and will be skipped by first-time posters

Disaster_of_Passion [kit/kit's, she/her] - 1.0yr

yeah sure, sign me back up boss

done!

segfault11 [she/her, any] - 1.0yr

get the crumb off my dang post please

AntifaSuperWombat [she/her] - 1.0yr

They've replied to your post, thus you have to add them to the list. Those are the rules, right? madeline-smug

Carcharodonna [she/her] - 1.0yr

Throw me in catgirl-salute

ok!

sodium_nitride [she/her, any] - 1.0yr

What time am I supposed to post the new megathread? I have the post ready to go.

any time from 12 AM EST to 9 AM EST is fine really, i try to keep it on a monday schedule to make sure people get full weeks

I messed up the time. Sorry. Didn't see your message before posting

it's ok, we'll feature it at midnight

musicenjoyer [it/its, xe/xem] - 1.0yr

am vegan now trans-vegan catgirl-heart

inTheShadowOf [she/her] - 1.0yr

Yay! That's great trans-vegan cat-trans

Ceres [she/her] - 1.0yr

trans-vegan lets-fucking-go

Moss [they/them] - 1.0yr

there are two types of nier automata fanart:

the most beautiful, solemn, thoughtful art ever painted

okay 2b's ass isn't THAT big

i seem to remember that they made a nsfw subreddit that's literally all about her ass

doggirl-sweat ...i've heard

EstraDoll [she/her, he/him] - 1.0yr

subreddit of horny people dedicated to your ass

transition goals

bolshevikLovelace [she/her, love/loves] - 1.0yr

::: spoiler ya girl ain't legally male anymore

the law recently changed so that there's no bottom surgery requirement! i've been hella overwhelmed lately but this was a nice thing to finally get done penguin-dance :::

BountifulEggnog [it/its, she/her] - 1.0yr

::: spoiler spoiler Congrats! Makes me so mad/emotional that'd ever be a requirement, especially if they don't pay for it. :::

Especially since not everyone is dysphoric over that. All trans people without bottom dysphoria would just never get to change it :/

::: spoiler spoiler thank you! and right?? it ends up indirectly costing tens of thousands of dollars just to get a silly field on your birth certificate changed. it's wild that it took them until 2025 to change the law (they are the last state in aus-delenda-est to do so) but i'm glad it's finally done :::

Yay! That's such a huge sigh of relief when it's done cat-trans

cat-trans

they also removed the "previously known as [deadname]" part too, massive relief indeed

TheSpectreOfGay [hy/hym, she/her] - 1.0yr

ur friendgroup being almost 100% poly and trans is rly fun cos they all end up dating each other then realizing they're not actually compatible at all and breaking up so everyone in the friendgroup has dated at some point

Wmill [they/them, fae/faer] - 1.0yr

This is my friend group fr, everyone has dated or has been metamors at one point except me. I don't know what to make of it and I stopped caring about it anyway.

SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them] - 1.0yr

RION [she/her] - 1.0yr

WAYTOOBASED

What's the point of insurance if doctors/surgeons won't take it? Ridiculous system

0x2640 - 1.0yr

companies make money and dont spend money treating you

its a win win!! /j

🎀 Seryph (She/Her) - 1.0yr

Bought a cropped black jacket the other day and it turns out I kill in goth fits and I'm kinda obsessed ngl, can't stop thinking about it. I still like my usual style more but it is a very strong look for me

u kill in all fits cuz u just look that amazing smh

well i didn't quite ask her out... (she was about to be out of town for over a week tomorrow morning, bad time)

but uh

i did manage to get out some more than platonic words to her... and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh she didn't push back, seemed kind of receptive actually hyperflush

askdfnamasdfmasdfmmm.......... girls

girls bottom-speak

wolfinthewoods [none/use name] - 1.0yr

I hope the best for you comrade <3

yewler [she/her] - 1.0yr

I have joined the injections club

Alisu [she/her, they/them] - 1.0yr

Congrats!! Happy for you

Thanks! It's soooooo much easier than I thought it was going to be. I was like what do you meannnn lots of trans people stick themselves with a needle every few days?? But turns out it's the easist thing I've ever done lmao

Going back to visit my parents has reminded me why I didn't want to come out to them. They generally just treat me as if I am stupid, as if everything I do will cause me to die or something and force me to follow their religious traditions.

No matter how much I love them, it is impossible for me to maintain a healthy relationship with them. I don't want to come out and have them argue with me about how I am not actually trans or how I am destroying my body with hormones. I know for a fact that I will get angry and say things that I shouldn't.

In retrospect, I literally just had an emotional argument with them, and it was triggered over how fucking stupid I am aparantly because I don't wash my rice. This shit ain't working.

WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them] - 1.0yr

"Have you considered that some people are transphobic? I think you might have forgotten and maybe reminding you will change your mind or something?"

Hi transgenders what is everyone doing today? I've been spending time with my dog

went out for errands in a new skirt which was very nice

nemmybun [she/her, sae/saer] - 1.0yr

Been playing tmodloader doing a master difficulty rogue playthrough on Calamity + Thorium (and other mods)

Really happy to have found some FF vanities so I can run around as Agrias. Now I just need a chocobo mount

i am the victim of transphobia today (forced to sell my labor to the capitalist class for less than its value)

LocalOaf [they/them, she/her] - 1.0yr

Homemade pizza chefs-kiss

pretending to work while watching GDQ

Wish I could do that. I have been checking out what runs are going on occasionally, but I cant just watch.

Been studying my ass off for my comps on Friday

Taking a break at work atm to nap at my desk, probably going to spend tonight doing laundry which should be cozy today

Hell yeah, I'm also doing nothing in work rn. I managed to write about 400 words of my novel on my phone which is definitely not the ideal way but it's the only way I can at work lol

I interacted with a squirrel yesterday. Pretty sure I saw the same one in the park a few weeks ago because it's in the same spot and it's interested in people while the rest seem scared of people.

learning about 3D graphics. I actually took a class on graphics a long time ago when I was in college, but it focused more on the math parts, and only got into coding/application in the last month, so I lost interest and didn't go any further with it. the book I'm following this time is more like 80:20 with the programming:math ratio, so it's been easier for me to follow.

up with trans

me at the start of 2024: "still cis tho still cis tho"

me today: buying loose incense at the local pagan witchy shop, getting distracted because it was supposed to be for Mars but they got a fantastic blend for Aphrodite that could easily be for Venus. My C cups are sitting in a comically femme $10 top from H&M and I'm asking the clerk to special order a book about the history of Venus. My driver's license has a girl name on it and says that I got an F at sex

wtf happened to my life? i mean, this is fucking great but also wtf life comes at you so fast sometimes

local pagan witchy shop

ghhhhhhhh why cant we live anywhere with this kinda stuff

homophobic >:c

/silly

SuperZutsuki [they/them] - 1.0yr

F is the highest grade for can get, though! I got an X :/

MusicOwl [comrade/them, sie/hir] - 1.0yr

I love that @EstraDoll@hexbear.net ’s neopagan arc is so going so strong. anarchist-occult

i have no idea what i'm doing but I praise Venus (and more) anyway

hungrybread [comrade/them] - 1.0yr

This rocks and super happy for you comrade!

Just curious, were you not particularly spiritual before transitioning? Sometimes I feel like there's a cool witchy person in me but the less cool annoyling pessimistic and atheist side tends to win out. also both sides feel oddly gendered for whatever reason.

NGL I feel like I'm on a similar trajectory but still at the "still cis tho" phase, and have been for a long time now. Not really sure how to get started on trying out different elements of transitioning tbh, but I just bought a new dress that I really like so I guess I'll start there. No idea where to go after lmao

Just curious, were you not particularly spiritual before transitioning?

After a lifetime of being an athiest, hitting a real low point with alcoholism a few years ago shifted me into a "idk anything" agnostic, which is what I stayed after transitioning for a bit. After almost a year into it I hit a point to where I started rhetorically "speaking" with Venus which very slowly actually shifted into me asking her until one day I got something that felt like an answer. I just rolled with it from there on and now I got a big shrine to Venus and two smaller ones to other gods in my bedroom. Truthfully, I still can't get past the "idk shit" agnosticism. There's still that atheist voice in my head saying that none of this is real, I just ignore it and pray anyway 🤷‍♀️. Venus being real or not, I still managed to kick my drinking problem with her anyway

As for your transition, does it feel like something is stopping you? Very trite and obvious to say but very very few cis people question how cis they are at all, let alone years. Do you have any trans/queer friends at all?

decreased trans mega posting is a recession indicator theory-gary

stonks-down

::: spoiler cw depression Something about depression is that I never actually know what appropriate sadness is. Like if I randomly get sad during the day I don't know if that's the same as people who aren't depressed or if that's just the symptoms rearing their head again :::

Two excerpts from a text convo with an older lesbian at work I opened up to:

Do you really think that most people really think that way? I wouldn't think that MOST people do. (said most people are transphobic and don't think we should have all the rights we should have)

What's wrong with your voice and size?? It seems like there's a lot of internal pressure for you to be a certain way.

Literally even the queers don't understand transphobia and dysphoria, actually so cooked. Same woman who refuses to help me diy. I'm still trying to see if she can be a support person etc but I'm low key very annoyed people don't understand.

Holy fuck thinking about how transphobic cis people are actually makes me lose my fucking mind I feel so fucking awful now

CrookedSerpent [she/her] - 1.0yr

I don't see gender :)

Next time someone asks me why I transed my gender I'll show them this

Got my mom to say she'd take T if she wasn't worried about her heart problems. Can't be sure it wasn't just an excuse to be subtly transphobic, but I have suspected her issue with me changing hormones is largely because she can't understand why someone would want to be on E.

egg mom????

I've been saying it. She's said a lot of eggy things. It's why I excuse her being mildly transphobic.

I say I got her to say it, but really the only thing I did was gain some weight since I last visited, and she commented "did you know you were gonna get fat in the spots girls do? I'd go the other way" when I got there. I told her she should switch to T and that's when the heart-problems excuse was given.

She's not blood related, so this isn't any evidence of genetics of egginess. A lot of my understanding of gender came indirectly from her though, which explains partly why my shell was so thick...

did you know you were gonna get fat in the spots girls do?

oh i had no idea that would happen. it certainly wasn't the #1 reason I wanted to do E 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

I'd go the other way

????? EGG! EGG! EGG!

did you know you were gonna get fat in the spots girls do?

oh i had no idea that would happen. it certainly wasn’t the #1 reason I wanted to do E 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

I took it to try to increase my chances at blood clots/breast cancer and to try to lose muscle mass. /s

I’d go the other way

??? EGG! EGG! EGG!

She might have been taking about it being easier to lose weight on T than E rather than specifically where it goes?

But given she dresses as a guy, often has been gendered as a guy (happens less now that she's older), seems happy with people thinking she's guy, sometimes socializes as a guy, etc, I kinda think she transitioned decades ago and just never realized it...

computer graphics is woke

woke GPUs are destroying the traditional family structure 😤

kristina [she/her] - 1.0yr

I hate getting into arguments with people I respect blob-help

The key to liking arguments is to win them.

Beetle [hy/hym] - 1.0yr

Someone recently told me to avoid the word transphobia and use trans hate or trans discrimination instead because

Transphobia sounds way too nice for what it describes
Phobia’s are actual mental disorders and comparing hate with such a disorder is ableist

I find the 1st argument very compelling so I’ll try to make more usage of the phrase ‘trans hatred’ when it fits. I honestly don’t know enough about language and the usage and etymology of ‘phobia’ to judge on the 2nd argument.

first argument is compelling

second argument is a very big stretch we would say

Arahnya [fae/faer, he/him] - 1.0yr

Transmisia means basically this

Every night I can dream about being someone else and then when I wake up I'm disappointed and just looking to get through the day to go back to sleep sleepi

message for the puppygirls:

awwwrrffff!!!!!! *wagwagwagwags* doggirl-happy

I want feminine clothes... I need to move out ASAP. Don't wanna come out to transphobes, but I need to feel like myself

Get some outfits to wear in your room when you're alone until then.

Hmm, maybe, I'll get some stuff, but keeping it hidden and washing the clothes is kinda hard

telling every trans woman i know that they're already super pretty and don't need FFS so they'll cancel their appointments and get me boosted up the list faster

nefarious

outhouseperilous @lemmy.dbzer0.com - 1.0yr

You also need to sell how harrowing it is. Really lay it on thick.

Edit: add in some terrible long term effects.

Whenever I'm feeling overwhelmed or depressed just cuddling with my plushies makes me feel protected. Was feeling like shit earlier so yeah good solution, I feel it would work better though if I had a huge plushie thonk

i’m something like a huge plushie crush

meow-hug

Grownbravy [they/them] - 1.0yr

LacerTTRPG is another one of those games i’m ready to play but i have neither time nor players.

Giant robots, the future, communism, whats not to love?

Biggay [he/him, comrade/them] - 1.0yr

i would highly reccommend the discord PilotNET, as lancer is probably the best RPG for playing at a computer, and the discord is also trans as fuck.

wojak-nooo "noooooooo ur theological basis for the existence of an ancient roman goddess can't be ur own ass, there are 100% secular explanations for it"

gigachad-hd "Venus is real because she gave me a really nice ass and tits off just one year HRT"

Praying to Venus for the same. 4 months to go LET'S GO lets-fucking-go

No money for treats means my skin doesn't break out as much stalin-feels-good makes shaving way easier and I lose some weight on my face. Not trying to glamorize poverty just looking for some upside rn

Shit, I'm in love with my best friend

catgirl-huh

Bolshechick [it/its, she/her] - 1.0yr

Relatable

uhoh

The guys in class started to ask me if their girl's nails looked good and for the price they paid, honestly them gel nails with a cute design really worth it. 30 bucks I'd drop that money for them so I told them their girls got a real good price with that. Honestly feeling real cool being acknowledged for my talents dubois-dance

thought this looked unique

woaaaagggg pwetty

Ty got back on the sparkle grindset

iridaniotter [she/her] - 1.0yr

The colors made me immediately think of the cover art for Metrowing's Alice doujinshi EP

I'm not familiar with that one but I'll take the compliment catgirl-salute

Yes I really like the nails catgirl-happy

Ty the self expression is top tier but the compliments make me keep wanting to show them off

sparkly hexagons 😲

Oh shoot you're right I was too caught up in the color vs the shapes power-genius

f4f but it’s futch 4 futch

waow-based

OpheliaAzure [fae/faer] - 1.0yr

wow what a great topic!

I've been running a Lancer campaign for some hexbear folks for a few months now. Has been a lot of fun. I've never been a mech person, but I've read a lot of sci-fi and the suppliments for lancer are amazing. We finished Operation Solstice Rain and are on the last half of Operation Winter Scar, highly recommend.

Up with mechanized chassis!

sictransitgloria [she/her] - 1.0yr

trans girls r cool n pretty 👍

truuuuuuu

I've been reading a lot of WIPs of interactive fiction lately, most of them are really good and getting better about being trans and gender stuff. I'm mostly annoyed since most of these will likely never be finished though, this is like reading fanfics but somehow them being abandoned sucks even more. negative

I've never read anything like that before, do you have any recs?

Omg thank you! I can't wait to start going through this list catgirl-happy

Video games? Sorry we only have video dames

life is like a video dame

trying hard to beat the stage

all the while

still collecting coooooiiiiiiins

meat-free bacon call that a cis lesbian

sun aint even up yet and it’s 90°F 😖

i was hoping this was another deltarune thread...

my toxic trait is that I don't like deltarune

well in that case... get the crumb off my dang post please

catgirl-hiss

same :c

Another Kris Deltarune sketch. I'm thinking the style that I'm starting to develop would work a lot better on a drawing tablet than with pen and paper

Finally back home. So tired.

The (suspected closeted trans woman) at work has been talking to me more recently, hoping that keeps working out. tbh we're both quiet and awkward with each other and idk how well we actually gel. Maybe that's just dooming though. Maybe I am bad at making ~~queer~~ friends.

gender affirming cookie monster pajama pants

God I love being trans so much. Life is good ya'll

Hell yeah cat-trans

Omg saaaaaaame

down with cis

Dessa [she/her] - 1.0yr

Locked in so hard last night planning for a trip and barely slept yamcha but at least it's going to be a dope ass trip.

if you are what you eat guess that makes me beanis stay frosty trans mega

how I post in private

how I post in public

::: spoiler si god I hate hate this. I hate having to get up every stupid morning. I hate having to exist. I hate every stupid fucking moment here. I wish I was dead. Then I wouldn't have to put up with ts anymore. god I hate it all so much. Idek what's wrong this morning. I hate existing. Life sucks and I'm done with it. Every fucking day. :::

Super_Lumalo [he/him] - 1.0yr

lancer-bike

Doing my best hoping the fall didn't result in a broken ankle to now hoping it's not a sprain. I'll admit it's my coping mechanism fully at play but went to eat my lunch hoping it'll speed up recover but I think it only helps so much. If I can take a power nap at work then I'll be set in a few hours

I remain obvivious to a lot of guy talk, dude asking me if that pescado is my deal "nah I'm vegan" he meant some random chick. I admit I am slow but idk ain't my style

It might be because of my luck but pretty much all the guys I work/study with know I'm vegan and none of them rag on me for it. It's pretty cool when people acknowledge and respect your principles. Idk all this time hanging out with them I've been noticing more softer sides from them more genuine, I do notice some bad things I don't like but I think it balances out. I got hurt today and pretty much all of them where looking out for me catgirl-cry it's something I appreciate greatly I did what I could today despite limping because I didn't wanna let them down. I'll reiterate I feel incredibly blessed that people are kind to me even when I don't always feel like I deserve it.

"hey, if someone were to ask you out on a date around here, where would you want them to take you?"

alright chat, smooth way to ask someone out or no?

If someone said that to me, I would take it literally and miss all the subtext.

I am overthinking my topic for the mega.

The only thing I am geeking about right now is Kagurabachi.

And higher dimensional spaces

Thnx for reminding me im supposed to be reading that 😅

Recent chapters are absolutely peak. Idk how far you are, but I would marry

::: spoiler spoiler Samura :::

In a heartbeat.

peanutbuttercupola [she/her] - 1.0yr

I will pick my topic the night before the thread goes up lol.

The cicadas are out!! I love them so much. Today I saw a grey short haired cat sticking their head out a window with their elbows on the window sill looking down the street (it was adorable.) Checked on the apricots but they're still green. Saw some cool art (graffiti) of a lady smoking and a few cats. Also, im going to make some flatbread.

Studying electricitylooks inside trigonometry, many such cases 😔

Trigonometry

Triangles

O_O

illuminati

They are behind everything!

It was right in my face this whole time shocked-pikachu

the amish avoid electricity because of its sinful nature

My teacher told us that electricity is angry and will kill you first chance it gets so I get it.

it’ll tan your insides if you’re not careful

Funny thing is I been shocked once, it didn't hurt and felt kinda good like a rush. I don't feel like testing this out again but I feel like while everyone else would perish I'm just built different

Idk what happened, but I feel like less of a person these days. My creativity, energy, discipline, passion and even talent all feel like they are just gone.

Being with my family hasn't improved things. I think I have some sort of undiagnosed mental pathology (being too cool perhaps?). Or maybe it's cause my parents aren't letting me take my multivitamin gummies.

They aren't letting you take it??

No, because my parents consider it a sign of weakness or something. Like, they get really panicky around anything medical.

Also I am not allowed to eat rice on Tuesdays. Yeah ...

I'm sorry you have to deal with that :/

::: spoiler dysphoria Shaved and ahhhhh my skin is so awful I wanna cry

catgirl-flop :::

Went out for my sister's birthday and took some pictures...

::: spoiler weight stuff I'm the thinnest I've been since maybe high school? But every time I see a picture of myself I know I need to lose more more more. I've got 35 pounds until I hit my loosely defined goal weight but I don't even know if that's going to be enough. I really hate the way it shows up in my face... My sister's face looks so much better proportioned. The bright side is people always say my sister and I look very similar so maybe I can turn out like her. :::

Also my nips were a lot more visible in the pictures than I expected... Like more than can be easily explained. Might try to invest in some more drapey outer layers to mask that for the moment

::: spoiler weight stuff me for the past 6 months

:::

I have it more like this

Also my nips were a lot more visible in the pictures than I expected

Maybe those silicone nipple cover things might help? I haven't tried those out yet, but thinking of it

Oh I hadn't thought about that. I'd have to test em out to make sure they don't make it even more obvious somehow 🙃

mayakovsky [any] - 1.0yr

For anyone wanting to play lancer on their own: https://wick.itch.io/lancer-tactics

deltarune reference :3 /silly

I finally watched the John wick movies. I am really surprised by how much of their runtime consists of John wick just wrestling/fighting with random grunts you didn't care about.

I was also expecting the movies to be highly tense, but other than the first movie, John barely ever takes damage. This isnt a spoiler (cause it's the first scene of the first movie), but in the first, my guy ends up completely fucked up and shot and bleeding out. In the next movies, John is fighting increasingly tougher opponents while taking increasingly less damage (and all the blunt force impacts he takes stop meaning anything).

I'll be completely honest, I thought the Americans were at least good at making action slop.

I saw the scene from one of the sequels on TV at a friend's house once where he and some bad guy are shooting at each other with super silenced Hollywood ass pew pew pistols in the subway nonchalantly while everyone around them doesn't notice anything and I cracked up and was like "c'mon man" whywhywhywhywhy

At least that shit is a lot more fun than John akwardly rolling around killing 20-50 goons every location and then saying "yeah" occasionally T_T.

KrupskayaPraxis - 1.0yr

::: spoiler heartbreak of potential friendship Going through mourning the loss of potential friendships. I was in a class with a group of people who became friends and I hung out with them sometimes. I had a great time with them but couldn't really connect with them on the same level as they did with each other. I think because I was still really shy, nervous and insecure, and closed myself off from them sometimes. I was a little earlier in my transition and wasn't on hormones yet, and I feel like that was a reason why I was that way. I grew in social skills after that, but I think a part of it was experiences I learned in that class. It hurts knowing what could've been. If I transitioned earlier, I think I would've become friends with them :::

The worst no-copyright game isn't 06 but generations and here's why ::: spoiler spoiler I don't like it creature :::

I have got to start taking better care of myself kitty-cri-potato

My pain threshold remains high though I'm still walking with a limp rn, it does take a toll on me mentally through out the day and wanting to nap is so enticing but I got only a week left of training. I've maintained perfect attendance and I don't wanna give that up yet, I feel my only redeeming quality is my stick to it-ness catgirl-flop wish I was smart or nimble inside I just wanna give up and if it wasn't for my prep talks I give to myself and people counting on me I would have.

Today is a new day, feeling better from yesterday. Probably got another day of construction work for this training. By tomorrow I should be all good so I hope, I hope not to let a simple scalffold beat me. Maybe tomorrow I'll climb it again and get down safely

Like a know it's a sign of social alienation and captialism and the rest but I fully get the temptation of AI dating, having immediate response when you're feeling things would be great. Friends are good don't get me wrong but when they got a full plate or other things having a reassuring voice is so nice. I know the key is being my own reassuring voice (believe me I talk to myself a lot) but just another voice that will say meow-hug it's gonna be alright is good. I hate being alone but until I fix myself I feel stuck like this.

Normally I'd delete this because I feel like I'm being needy or whiney but fuck it I'll keep going. I'm staying positive and taking things in stride right now, I've worse setbacks in life and I'm still alive and as long as I keep living I'll keep moving forward. I know part of this previous post was hinting at the idea of me needing fixing or possibly a relationship helping me and idk. I'm trying not to take leave my development in other people's hands and striking a good balance of when I can ask for help.

I've seen friends get better through the love and support their partners give them that shit looks real nice. I'd be blessed if I can find that support one day but in the mean time I gotta be my own love and support system.

This is why I developed an alternative personality. I stay sane by straight up hallucinating my own company.

I do this too but I've heard it's called system, honestly finding stuff out that you've been doing for so long makes you feel so niko-wonderous

::: spoiler Misgendering/depression I don't want to go out because I don't want to be misgendered. A few friends that I'm not out to, want to go out and keep insisting. But I just don't feel like it. I keep feeling like I'm an asshole for it. Because I've been neglecting them for a while, but I just don't want to deal with all of that and how it affects my feelings right now. Like, if they just let me be for some time, when I start my processes I'll come out to them and feel better about going out with them. But holy shit can they be unbearable assholes when you don't give them all the priorities of the #1 friend group most important over everything that's not the obligations of adult life :::

::: spoiler Generally bad feelings/depression Feeling like I have no option but to ghost them because they push way too hard and keep trying to guilt you over not wanting to go. Buddies, I don't want to leave my house to go to the supermarket. I'll have to go to work now and that alone is eating me away. I want to live alone, but wouldn't be able to pay rent. Idk, just wanna scream into the void or something, maybe throw myself in bed, or keep hanging ou with my friends from my org who are super validating and are the best people in my life RN, they are the thing keeping me from a breakdown :::

Had a dream I could fly, felt amazing going around so uninhibited. I know those dreams mean freedom and stuff so I get it been feeling real restricted with my schedule and the limp I still got this dream is telling that. Part of the dream did involve also draining the energy out of an ancient evil too, I was fine afterward none of those bad vibes changed me.

::: spoiler misgendering

kinda bringing this on myself 'cause I'm not out at work, but...

have a new hire on the team and he's a younger guy and he keeps calling me "bro" and just... uuuuuuuuuugh lt-dbyf-dubois

::: spoiler spoiler I know how that is, one of my coworkers calls me man fucking constantly :::

paying a woman on youtube $500 to recreate this one moment i had 3 weeks ago in a bath and body works where the nice lady at the counter explained the sign up process for the rewards program in the form of an ASMR video

Des [she/her, they/them] - 1.0yr

those RL unintentional ASMRs hit so hard

generic amerikan garden salads are easily enhanced by adding diced avocado theory-gary

Wheaties [she/her] - 1.0yr

is the LANCER artwork done by the same person who does Kill Six Billion Demons?

Looked it up, it is!

Sorry for filling the mega ::: spoiler si/hopelessness/misanthropy It feels inevitable. I am not satisfied to live in such a disgusting society with- you get the point. So obviously, I should try and enjoy whatever time I have left. I don't really enjoy doing anything though. What is there left to do.

I'm hoping to go on a little trip with some friends end of this month. That will be my first time doing something like that- never got invited before I guess. And I'm planning on going to a local queer group with an older lesbian at work beginning of next month. Don't really have any expectations for that, probably going to be super awkward and I don't really know what I'll get out of that, but I'll try and see what/who is there. Dunno what there is any further out then that..

I've been feeling incredibly misanthropic and hateful lately. They've taken everything from me, all my happiness, everything. I hope they suffer and die like me. I remember when I first started getting help for my depression, she told me she wouldn't wish this on anyone. I would, fuck them I hate them. If humanity is going to ruin me like this and drive me to suicide then fuck them too. I think that's a good place to end it with out sounding too unhindged. Oh I guess looking back at what I wrote, obviously not every individual. Whatever you probably understand what I mean. :::

restless [she/her] - 1.0yr

CW dysphoria around imagined body hair

Had a dream the other night that I woke up and looked in the mirror only to see a patch of weirdly long hair on one cheekbone and a chest so thick with hair I couldn't see the skin underneath. First thought was "what the fuck now I have to deal with this shit too??" It was not very pleasant -:-

WIIHAPPYFEW [any, any] - 1.0yr

the lancer trans mega just HAS to be the day right after I got booted from my team for being late too many times :,(

Expanding my gender got a total of 4 fruit scented bodywashes catgirl-heart strawberries n cream, peaches, melon n pineapple, and coconut. Right now decided to treat myself with these, they from the dollar store but they smell quite good and so do I now. Usually if it's too much for me or to be noticeable I do have regular scented antibacterial soap but some days you gotta treat yourself. Also nice to flex on all the stinky guys I train with catgirl-smug

I feel like Ive been too hard on my old drawings in the past, they're actually really good -- I just needed to finish them. My perception was that it looked worse than it actually is. However my drive to improve my skills is evident in my confidence and quickness with which I can now produce clean lines and symmetrical shapes. I wish I had more time to draw, definitely feel unexercised because drawing for 15 min last night was quite tiring. Plus I need fresh ideas and sources to draw, so I'm going to take my sketchbook outside and draw the morning glories / plants.

Got a book for HVAC techs and I like how one of the questions is: you have a office worker complaining about the temperature being all over the place do you A. lie to them B. blame the shit as engineer who made the AC system C. help them or D. Ignore them. Ngl everything but the correct answer looks so goddamn tempting lmao

Thorngraff_Ironbeard [he/him] - 1.0yr

I've only played lancer once but I really liked it. I don't know the name of the frame I had but I made an artillery mech that ended up with a big ass ship cannon on it. My callsign was "Mailman" which I thought was funny for the artillery stuff.

It might have been the Barbarossa! The Barbarossa comes pre-equipped with the Apocalypse Rail as its frame power, which in the fluff was originally designed for heavy duty space fighters. My first mech was a Barbarossa and it does, indeed, always deliver catgirl-smug

(... sorry for the random info dump I really really like Lancer)

No problem It seems pretty cool. I plan on watching some lore vids.

fox [comrade/them] - 1.0yr

There's a bunch of material out there. Besides the published game books there's also a collection of short stories by one of the authors and a wealth of released draft lore (so canonicity is dubious). There's a Lancer iceberg and in the deepest layers is APEP.

My certification came in the mail the other day, can't show it but believe me when it says "NOT STINKY" 😌 the rest of y'all need to get on my level. I don't wanna call anyone out or nothing just saying

this horse game is such a good stim it's triggering the same kinda things shiny hunting does for me

CDommunist [she/her, love/loves] - 1.0yr

FRIDAY jeb

RICE sicko-charging

I want to climb and sleep in a tree, I must be a cicada undergoing metamorphosis 😴

I've found the ost to the sonic X series, seems mostly japanese ost so I'm having a good time. The opening sonic drive has fully grown on me whatever the english one was at this point. Honestly I need to fully sit down and watch the series in japanese, I started it before and then got distracted doesn't help that I have to go to some weird sites to see the japanese dub. Other than black knight it might be the last piece of sonic media that I'll prob dive into as much, I could be wrong but I think the anime was developed with the help of the main writer at the time Maekawa so you know it's good.

This image makes me laugh so much I'll just be doing something and think "Long live the Holiday administration". Like wdym Carol's strongest soldier is the weird kid who eats moss

I need to remind myself to check my dating apps more often. It can sometimes be a long time before I use it again. Guess this is why I don't go on dates often

Idk what's wrong with me. I've been wanting hrt for a year, told myself I'd do it a bunch of times, still nothing. Why am I like this. Told someone two weeks ago I was hoping to order it by the end of the week. He probably doesn't think I'm ever going to.

Can't even get this done how am i going to voice train

no-copyright unleashed is a game but a much better game is unWIIshed and the main reason for it is the level design is tighter and lack of having to dig for sun and moon emblems. So people know this game as the one that started the boost formula but it really started on the ds with rush and guess what the main guy for that game worked on UnWIIshed vs unleashed so it does the boost system much better not to mention the stages lend are similiar to rush in how tight they are. UnWIIshed does also have medals but you get them through time attacking the game which honestly helps the pace so much more than having to stop and look around for them because you need them to progress the story.

::: spoiler sad, lonely, negativity, talking about si, dysphoria I feel so alone in this. No one irl understands at all. idk how much people here do. I'm waiting to hear back from 3 different people. Dunno if I'll end up hearing from any of them today.

There's so much. I had hoped summer coming around would make me feel better. I think I'm doing better then I was in the winter but I'm still thinking about suicide every day. Some days I can barely stop. It all hurts so badly. When am I supposed to move to acceptance.

Lonely and painful. Being trans has been the worst experience of my life. And it never stops. Its ruined me. I was such a happy child. Where has the time gone. Months, years, it just slips away..

So many of my friends have slipped away too. Some by unfortunate circumstance. idk about all of them, or why we fell apart. Its probably my fault for being this way. I try so hard not to be and it just doesn't work

I can't accept it. This is a nightmare.

Wanted to complain about facial hair earlier so here's that I guess. ::: spoiler spoiler It makes me want to kill myself. Shave every fucking day. Still stubbly regardless of how I do it. My skin never feels properly smooth. I look at all the cis women and feel so much envy. Getting laser as soon as I get a car. From what I've heard that reduces it but doesn't even get rid of it. I know it sounds dramatic or whatever but ts makes me want to kill myself every time. I'm not saying it was the cause but right around the age it came in I started falling apart completely. Failing classes. Lost motivation. Stopped taking care of myself or even playing games. Years and years of this shitty zombie life. Its all because I'm trans. I should kill myself. :::

::: spoiler spoiler

When am I supposed to move to acceptance :::

https://youtu.be/F_wvq9TD5z4

HexReplyBot [none/use name] - 1.0yr

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

someone in here was talking about This Is How You Lose the Time War right? thanks because seeing that planted that name in me, saw it at a bookstore, bought it, and then just now read the whole thing in one sitting

ouauagh

no-copyright riders seems like the most complex sonic game to me and something I'd definitely be down to learn but like it's so hard for me to break into it. I guess even though I do like going fast having to compete with ai makes things messy, with most sonic games you can memorize the lay out, plan optimally and perfect your skill. Adding ai that does it's own thing or messes you up frustrates me and makes me resent the game at times, I want a game where I can perfect a level for weeks at a time doing it over and over again creature