hi, does anyone wanna make the mega in the upcoming weeks? if so, reply to this post and i'll add you to the list!

the list as it stands:

Hestia (5/5 - 5/11)
EstraDoll* (5/12 - 5/18)
SadArtemis* (5/19 - 5/25)
yewler* (5/26 - 6/1)
AshenWolf* (6/2 - 6/8)
PeeNutButtHer (6/9 - 6/15)
oscardejarjayes* (6/16 - 6/22)
GayTuckerCarlson* (6/23 - 6/29)
Eco* (6/30 - 7/6)
Disaster_of_Passion (7/7 - 7/13)
peanutbuttercupola* (7/14 - 7/20)
BountifulEggnog* (7/21 - 7/27)

​ * after name denotes someone who has posted before and will be skipped by first-time posters

"can you believe this law will affect cis women too? they really haven't thought this through"

a) yes they have thought it through, they actually don't care about their wellbeing either

b) if someone points a gun at me, and your first concern is a hypothetical person standing behind me who might also get hit, then that's something for sure

Date this weekend has a lot of firsts:

• First real date.
• First kiss.
• First make out session.
• First cuddle session.

::: spoiler NSFW

• First partnered sex.
• First sleeping in a bed with a sex partner. :::

Next time they're spending a weekend at my place.

Resisting the sapphic urge to move in after one date.

So cute, the trans mega chat going on dates and kissing~

When the teens at my work bring their first girlfriends or boyfriends in, its so adorable. Puppy love

Pride month is approaching, and one of the most rage-inducing phenomenons I know is back: Liberals defending the pride flag by claiming it's not a political symbol but just a symbol of human rights and inclusivity and other totally not political stuff.

Genuinely such an offensive thing to say. I know there are bigger problems in the world, but this one makes me so fucking mad every time

down with cis (especially the British ones)

::: spoiler long bottom surgery euphoria posting, hornyposting Getting close to about a month after surgery, and recovering way ahead of schedule thus far. Already able to use the largest dilator and begin to experiment with some solo play. :>

I have started to be able to take walks in excess of a mile again and though they wear me out, it feels so good to be able to walk with no penis. I cannot wait to take my first run! Definitely feeling some serious muscle atrophy with mandatory prescribed couch potato time, but also have never felt so driven to get back to being active than this moment in my life.

I have thought myself asexual for most of my life but have been feeling that called into question this month now that I have the genitals that feel in line with my body. Been absolutely impeccably horny at all times and feeling more bisexual than ever. Most interestingly to me is that I have always considered myself a top, but have been really eager to know what bottoming feels like with the new equipment in coming months. My whole body feels electric even as I cannot yet orgasm whilst learning the new equipment and the nerves slowly realign.

Have literally never felt so at ease in my body as I have now, and am regularly getting emotional that this will just be me for the rest of my life. I did not expect to feel so absolutely happy with the results of having a vulva and a vagina, and i’m still so early in recovery. I cried so much this morning as I put on underwear I first purchased when I transitioned years ago and did not wear because it made me dysphoric, and it fit on my body correctly.

Life can be so fucking difficult, has been so fucking difficult for so long and will be difficult again, but right now, everything just got to go right for once. I am so grateful for that. :::

I did the dishes. Please clap for me.

up with trans

I don’t like when my wife takes a bath because I’m always nervous she will fall asleep and drown

reply to this post so i can see numbers in my inbox when i wake up. say something cool or interesting

Everyone is always gushing over sword lesbians, but there is no love for the humble spear lesbian

I read a chapter of a book. Please clap for me.

I was just chatting with an online friend (one who I don't talk to a whole lot but recently started chatting with more). I usually communicate with her by text, but I sent her a voice recording tonight.

She said, "Oh, cool! I like your voice."

And then I said, "Yeah, I'm still trying to sound less masculine, but I like my progress."

Then she said, "Wait, what do you mean?"

I said, "I'm training my voice to sound less masculine. It's very common for trans people to do!"

Then she said, "Wait, you're trans?"

I said, "Yeah, wait a minute, did you not know?"

Then she said, "No. I seriously did not!"

I thought she knew this whole time! She has seen multiple pictures of me, and my bio has a 🏳️‍⚧️ in it even!

And I said, "That's crazy. I never thought I looked feminine enough for people to basically assume I'm a cis woman."

She said, "Well, you obviously look very feminine to me."

Not only that, though, but she said this ALL after hearing me speak. And her initial reaction wasn't, "Wow, your voice is deeper than I was expecting" or anything like that... she just liked it and didn't question it. I guess that means that not only do I look more feminine than I think, but my voice sounds more feminine than I think too.

We laughed for a bit, and I ultimately let her know it's a very good, validating thing. Shit's crazy.

::: spoiler transition doomer posting, medical insurance bullshit

OH MY FUCKING GOD MY INSURANCE IS ACTUALLY DOG SHIT AND WON'T COVER ANY SURGERIES

the tl;dr is that they're operating out of a neighboring state instead of my own state, which means that because my plan is a very red state, they don't have to cover shit, despite the fact that I am living in a state to where I am legally guaranteed coverage

idk if it's totally joever just yet but fuck this is already looking very fucking bad

:::

Trans friend told me her preferred name the other day! :')

Her family is intentionally misgendering her daily >:'(

FTS Facial Theminisation surgery.

leggings my beloved

god i love dressing like a basic white bitch

BREAKING: JK Rowling drowns in 'turbulent' lake of molten diarrhea

Full body exfoliation today, feeling very soft

finally got my first pair of girl pants. I think I did okay guessing my size from a chart (goodwill does not have changing rooms so I couldn't try it on until I got home), it's a bit baggy for what should be skinny jeans, but it's close enough that i'll be wearing them. Overall I'm happy with it, but yall were not lying about the lack of pockets 🫠

>Me three weeks ago: "I sure am excited to have a little break between classes and work soon after all my exams are done!"

>Me today: still working on my last essay, cleaning my whole apartment, and starting work in a few days

My credit report says I'm clean, mature and thick 😎

for the first time since high school i stepped off the scales and saw I was below 200 pounds

I really need to find bras that are comfortable

Soooooo I’m definitely coming out at work after over 2 years of being in the closet. Out on medical leave right now and I’m pretty nervous to do it, should I just send an email? Or something? Change my picture on slack and show up in a dress? Idk haha

I’m mid (and that’s ok)

tfw you can't be a broad shouldered muscular battle Helga and a petite little Barbie doll at the same time

why

Thesis: i want a hug

Antithesis: the next person who touches me will get a fork in their eye

Synthesis: ???

Can't tell if my nipples are more sensitive due to HRT or just because I'm touching my chest more to check if it's growing

Tough because I'm overweight, so the man-boob to boob pipeline is muddled

if ever you're feeling bad, just remember you're not a youtuber who harasses the families of murder victims for their true crime content slop

Old Pokemon anime would just drop the line "ever since the animals disappeared and the Pokemon arrived..." and just move on like it's whatever. I know this line get retconed with the later games but I do idea that Pokemon just appeared recently and everyone is just so what they can to research them and understand them adds more mysticism that I like

Am I a chaser now?

Almost 100 comments

Post isnt even 24 hours old

Chat is this mega gonna pop off like the last one?

I know that

i like doing gender crimes

I hate being able to see my maladaptive processes and unable to do anything about them...

friday rice?? friday rice

I'm not a super senior nurse. I've only barely started to feel like I know this job.

Why when I'm in charge do the other staff ask me so much, some of them worked longer than meeeee. She's puffy because she's on prednisone, it's okay, lower her IV a bit she's drinking well, it'll come down. Trouble shoot the foley if its hurting, check for clogs - you check it theough this port yeah, I'll look through her chart if she has another anticholinergic that might help with baldder spasms, put on a warm blanket. He hurt his shoulder a week ago, its probably not why his sickle cell crisis pain is so bad 😭. Yes you can use methotrexate for arthritis, its not a med error, I know it's a cancer drug it has other uses too. What do you mean none of you know how to access an IVAD??? Okay I'll show you.

I don't mind being in charge but I don't get how I could possibly know my stuff any better? I feel pretty median in terms of my knowledge, I definitely don't feel like a resource.

Do you mean to tell me that a kimchi fridayed this rice on a Monday?

::: spoiler health insurance doom posting my insurance is self funded and based in one of the reddest states in the fucking country. they don't have to cover shit in this state despite the fact that i'm legally guaranteed coverage in the state i live and work in because they have their tiny loophole. i just double checked with the state insurance commissioner. i need an entirely new plan to get anything covered if i don't want it out of pocket :::

this choosing a new name thing is really difficult

Asked two friends to the movies tonight and they were both busy. Not to be dramatic or anything, but this is my personal 9/11

You don't get it if I keep scrolling I'll get that good hit of dopamine that will change everything (thought by everyone staying up too late)

::: spoiler spoiler It's past my bed time and making someone to at the ridiculousness of forever scrolling :::

Methinks I want to experiment with neopronouns a little

::: spoiler horny? for the last few weeks I can't stop daydreaming about having a boyfriend (and all the lewd stuff we would do ) which never happened when I was a "cis" "guy", in those days I had sexual fantasies but more about how specific girls I was into might act when I'm with them

idk where I'm going with this, but I think the point is that the sense of longing is different as a girl than before 🤔 :::

A child asked my parents if I was their daughter. Suspect it was a case of a child just assuming hair length is gender, but still cool to have at least someone assume I'm not a guy for once. Also particularly fun having that happen in front of my parents.

getting out of my time machine in 238 AD to warn Emperor Pupienus that his name will sound exceptionally silly in 1800 years (i will not warn him of his oncoming assassination)

sort laundry
1 sock is missing
sort laundry again

Why does this happen every single time?

i do all my clothes shopping at the 9/11 museum gift shop

check this shit out

update: i was murdered for saying "doodoo pee fart ass" and now i am using my spectral form to haunt the computer... this stinks

I always go back and forth on whether I'm actually trans or not...... It's so hard to like tell cause I think I've internalized that I'm co-opting or just using it as an aesthetic... Fuck I don't know what I am anymore.

Like I think I want to be a girl, but then I worry that I'm just fetishizing it and oh my god I've been doing this for months how do I figure this shit out.

Gonna be trying my best going forward to learn coding, python since this mega is snake related. Some course or some such offered through my library. 22 hours and I'll go from zero to hero it says, plus as with everything there's a discord because why not. The discord is more for students of the course apparently so I fully expect to see some more transes there if anyone is in it that is.

Very cute fruit

::: spoiler horny Progesterone got me in my dommy era :::

::: spoiler update: im not absolutely rizzless (cw kink)

Turns out im not as rizzless as i thought, had a vibe check with someone that escalated and i ended up being her chewtoy (well, more like nibbletoy) for a little while a good time was had by all

::: spoiler tea hack Add a bit of honey :::

I think garlic might be the most feminine of all the vegetables

It’s almost 8’o’clock.

Which means it’s almost time to bonk my beautiful wife’s head with a mallet so she can sleep

I'm already chaser~

What about widowmaker

::: spoiler spoiler It hurt so bad today. I need a few day break from existing. :::

*hiss*

::: spoiler miserable Feel like shit again today, I don't know why. Tried sleeping more. Nothing is hitting right. I can't think of anything specific. Maybe its dysphoria idk. This is horrible. I hate being forced through this. I can't see an end. I can't tonight. More coping I guess. fuck me. :::

i love bananas when they have brown spots n right before the stem gets small. i eat bananas "upside down" but everyone else is wrong because the stem is a perfect handle and the bottom is easier to open. usually i get like 1 day of "perfect banana" but i can eat like... 3 bananas max in the window before the rest become bread :/

Hi everyone!

you won't BELIEVE what they're calling this house in new orleans!!!

gonna go take a nap

eepy

::: spoiler sex

chat how tf do I find casual sex???

I have a sorta partner but they're six hours away minimum. I could take the drive but with the condition my brakes are in, that's spooky. How do I find people on apps that just wanna hook up without getting my kidneys stolen or getting hate crimed??

I also don't really wanna fuck any of my current friends so that's pretty out of the question. :::

i wanna learn archery it seems fun

::: spoiler Venting I'm so stressed right now. I start work tomorrow and I'm going to have more responsibilities than I'm used to at my new job. I'm so worried I'm gonna mess something up early and be fucked over all summer, or that I won't be able to cope with the increase in responsibility and will just collapse or fail to get my work done. And since it's my first time in any sort of leadership role I'm also just scared that I won't be able to actually do it effectively. I don't fucking know how to lead at all. I'm such a mess even at the best of times. How am I gonna be able to deal with all the extra meetings and directing people when I can't even make friends. I can barely even talk to the friends I do have without inevitably at some point accidentally insulting them.

And I still haven't finished my last essay and housecleaning so I can't even really spend today resting at all. I'm so fucking tired. I want to just slow down. I didn't even really sleep last night, just napped a lot since I was too stressed for a real sleep. I have no energy left. But I still have to keep pushing since I have so many commitments still. Literally every day until next Saturday I'll have some necessary thing to do or another and its been like this all month and I'm just so done. There's been so many messages from friends or family over the past month that I've accidentally ghosted since I just don't have the energy to reply to them and I feel awful each time but I also can barely even focus on the damn essay and other stuff that I really need to have done already. The one saving grace is that my seasonal depression is mostly done now so I'm not crying every single day anymore like I was around exam time. Instead I'm just, so, so tired and stressed.

Honestly tomorrow is even scaring me a little. I was expecting to start work with at least some rest between exams and it but since I haven't gotten any I have no clue how I'm going to be and coupled with all the stress I'm just a bit terrified. I'm glad I have the leadership role since i think it'll be good for me to work on those skills and everything but I also just, don't feel ready, not even a little bit. :::

I hope I get rid of this cough today

found my favorite sweatpants that were missing and forgot how comfy they are and I feel like my legs look good in how they fit me?

First laser session went well. It... Doesnt hurt? Everyone says it hurts but its kinda fine? Im gonna ask them to bump up the power next session

new character: italian bedwetter

ohhh i pee-a da bed! feel like-a i spill-a mio pinot grigio! mama mia...

Cough drops soothe my throat, but Friday Rice soothes my soul

Sunrise by Claude Monet, 1874

Zaza got me wanting to wear a sundress and make it go spinny

Also kinda wanna go skateboarding but I don't wanna potentially re-fuck up my hands if I fall

🛹

I thinks it's been about 9 or 10 months since I started wearing wired bras and I'm finally outgrowing my A-cups

I honestly thought they would stay that way forever since I haven't gotten much new growth since around january, but guess I was wrong.

::: spoiler misgendering gonna try and be brave and come out to my physical therapist today since she seems cool and I really don't wanna be called sir anymore and then awkwardly not reply looking around kinda confused and she just thought I was being rude and not replying to her or I didn't hear her or something lol :::

lonely

day 4 of intense effort to choose a new name. my external deadline is less than a week away. i have three tentative names, and one of them is being put through the ultimate test.

playing through Celeste for the first time with myself named it.

Does anyone here know what the best way is to change my name on my paypal account? I’ve read that some people could do it without any issues, yet others had to send them their ID, which I really don’t want to do.

transition goals: sexual techniques and a big round oily butt

I don't like bananas. Bad taste and texture. Evil foog

Did we beat the news mega last week?

I've been sick on & off for 2.5 weeks so far & today, chat, I went outside. It's a big day for me

i gotta be honest... i was killed 6000 years ago but i'm cursed to haunt this mortal plane for the rest of eternity... thankfully they let me use the computers at the library when nobody else is around

Think I’m almost over being sick

First

The Ten Largest (No. 3) by Hilma af Klint, 1907

::: spoiler gushposting Ugh I wish she wasn't 2 timezones awayyyy which god do I have to strangle for making that choice?

She is such a beautiful person I had no idea I had it within me to feel this way about a person. She wrote me a fucking poem last night and sent it to me this morning and I'm entirely beside myself right now. It's so pretty.

She's such an artistic and creative soul and I love that so much. She encourages me to tap into my own creativity and because of her I have a writing project I've been spending a lot of time on. I never would have done it without her encouragement.

She's so strong and brave and fucking hilarious and sweet and thoughtful and smart. I love her smile and her hair and her wit and fashion sense. Fucking hell I'm so close to just telling her flat out how I feel because at this point we've both said everything up to but excluding that :::

Scheduled my first laser session

Hanging out with the homies as we smoke our massive communal joint I get handed the aux chord and put on "State and Revolution" everyone loves it and young stalin kisses me on the mouth

Thank you to everyone who left a nice message in my inbox last night! I'm going to bed again, goodnight !

hello

Kinda miss how much US laser hurt

Breaking: Vietnam is ready for big event tomorrow

Did the whole life in another world dream this one a furry world with me not being furry though (I am a furry tho) all I had was my wits strength and my slow cooker full of uncooked oats to get me by. Made it home after making friends and being a legend though I left them some oats.

Trans people make the best music ever

::: spoiler kink

I love being a nibbletoy! Maybe one day i can graduate to chewtoy

::: spoiler sad, 'tism I hate feeling like a third (or fourth or fifth) wheel all the time and being overstimulated and overwhelmed attempting to be social

Everything is too much and I feel like I only ever get brought along to things out of pity and then do a bad job socializing while also barely holding it together the whole time and eating myself up mentally for not doing better

I feel like I'm just inherently magnetically repellent to neurotypical socializing

I have no clue how they can do it, I went to dinner at a (pretty nice) restaurant and all the noise was just unbearable while trying to fit into polite small talk and I got a massive headache and spent the whole time feeling like an awkward blob that was just unwanted baggage and was on edge the whole time dreading putting my foot in my mouth or spilling something or making an ass out of myself somehow but apparently it was a nice dinner according to normal people

I just wanna hide under the blankets in a dark quiet room for awhile

Existing for me often feels like that awkward hallway dance thing where two people are trying to walk past each other and both step into each other's way attempting to let the other by, but the other person is every person and the hallway is the world all the time

I'm really bad at this

:::

yawns and stretches another successful day of oversharing now its time to sleep soundl- ooohhhuuughghgggggghhhhhh noooooooooooooooo what have i done

::: spoiler horny af posting, bottom surgery mention Dear god, bottom surgery has got me feeling more horny than I have since puberty the first time. Really just want to top a boy and bite. Really curious of the implications of this for having identified as ace my whole adult life. :::

::: spoiler whining about how I sound No one believes when I make calls and claim to be myself. My name is masc but I got a baby femme voice so I got to do the birthdate, full social, mother's maiden name etc. "Can I speak to Mr Wmill" "that's me actually" "oh..."

I guess it wouldn't be so bad if my appearance wasn't so mismatching. Idk might need more sleep if this is bugging me :::

oooh, snake mega

::: spoiler mental health tired and feeling anhedonic

just gonna go to bed early and hope I feel better tomorrow

:::

British dude called me “love”

eepy and kinda cold and just wanna be all cozy and drowsy and lounge around like a cat

The days are getting hotter which means I'm gonna have to get to epilating my legs if I wanna wear shorts in public. It's just been so deceptive weather wise, barely last saturday it was raining and now hot all day.

Due to tarrifs I can no longer afford commas please understand thank you

where2cop injection supplies? also how2inject?

I'm switching from patches because my skin is not feeling the adhesive (or rather it's feeling it too much in a bad way)

shawty's got sexual techniques

NGL I was worried a few weeks out that Australia would elect Dutton just as I'm doing all my gender paperwork, so it's nice to not have that pressure even if the ALP suck.

::: spoiler stupid question for lube enjoyers

How long does K lube last after mixing? I cant find any information on it besides "k lube has preservatives so it doesnt go bad after mixing!" but nothing says how long until it does go bad...

I know nothing about snakes except that apparently some people put snake venom in their alcohol. Idk what that's all about (or if it even changes the taste besides being edgy).

Also, the younger gen z kids seem to have discovered "aura farming", aka being edgy and mysterious and cool, aka that thing the Internet has known about since before these kids were even concieved. Makes me feel old and I ain't even outta college.

I crave chipotle sauce... the cravings... the smokey flavor.

The Swans by Hilma af Klint, 1915

Bords de Méditerranée by Henri-Edmond Cross, ~1900

Voice training practice with Dracula flow lyrics

i have a 2000 word essay due tonight and i havent even done a quarter of it but all my brain wants to do is hang out naked and listen to jamiroqui

I love snakes too, eggnog~ they're so cute

I need to get my pizzacandy addiction under control

mfw I revive Karl Marx to lead the revolution only so see him addicted to factorio

Was looking chewbacca's father in the star wars wiki and I noticed they have pronouns now it's over the woke has claimed star wars wiki

::: spoiler weddings I'm normally not super into the idea of a wedding (all the attention seems overwhelming) but I was scrolling and she was talking about them and something just hit me tonight, god I wanna wear a dress and stand with someone I love as their bride... need... :::

the amazon kindle is an excellent device with which to read stolen books, gotta give them that

Played my first session of shadowdark ever (with new people no less!) and it was so funnnnnnn!!!

Playing Romancing Saga 2 remake, and transformed Wagnas is giving Jesus transitioned for your sins

::: spoiler for reference (probably nsfw) before

after :::

Would it be harassment if I asked every trans girl who posts a picture on Twitter what their measurements are?

::: spoiler sleepy sleeeeeeeeeepyyy :::

First two days of work done, a lot less stressed about it now. Also managed to finish the essay so now all I gotta do is finish cleaning when I find the motivation to. Either way feeling better now than I was a few days back.

ooo banana

7 pm bedtime, don't like it but I feel so good when I got to sleep then

Not the submarine but the marine who subbed up

A group of individuals known only as the Pee Ass 5 have made waves after peeing on their own asses today. As of now their motives are unclear but police have told us they've received a manifesto from the group. More on this story as it develops

I've been working on playing a song in the piano (i don't really play but i can pick out simple tunes) and i have been feeling good about it! i think i will be able to memorize all the chords today and maybe even shakily add in the singing part by days end! I'm pretty excited y'all i forgot i liked doing this and I'm stoked that i still can

::: spoiler cw: butt stuff, sex So, finally got the hemorrhoid on my sphincter removed. Recovery is going to be annoying, but should be fine. Cannot wait until it is all good and healed and I can start learning how to bottom. Because of the location, it felt impossible to relax/stretch without pain and blood. :::

Forecast is cloudy today, my power is effecting the weather based on my mood

My whole time I've had my neopronouns I've been referred with it once and it was glorious I can introduce myself with they/them pretty easy and more often I see the nonbinary option but it feels futile to explain neopronouns cuz like I don't fully get it either but they make me happy.

Being low T means my voice is dumb but I get to keep my hairline into my 30s so that's pretty good. Don't know if I'm actually low T but spiritually I am

No one told me that fat redistribution would absolutely wreck the thighs of my work jeans.

I run back and forth between welding machines, about four miles every night. After only one year of doing this all my work jeans have worn through the thighs and I've had to sew patches into them! This is bullshit. That's like several hundred dollars a year if I have to buy new ones (and I definitely will soon, the patches need patches now).

All those times my tummy hurt I thought it be the end yet I'm still here never give up or give in

>Writing essay

>"this sucks this sucks this sucks"

>Editing essay

>"I am a fucking genius this is the best essay ever"

Every time

::: spoiler sad thoughts/self reflection On the real I think I have like amazing texting game or whatever on the first day I meet someone and few days afterward and then I burn out. Then I just disappear for a while and work up the courage to talk again. Talking to people for the first time is such a hit of dopamine and after I'm like not getting the same so it becomes work. It's most likely not healthy on my end to treat relationships like this but I struggle to know how to walk this line sometimes walking away from alcohol or weed was easy but I rather not do that with people or have that be as easy or something. :::

skete

Authentic American Heritage

There's something so much harder about job interviews when the reason is better insurance for surgery. It's interesting how much that changes things. The times I interviewed previously I've felt quite confident, but now I'm emotionally tired and second guessing my responses. I didn't used to be like this :/

I don't always know what to post here, but I hope everyone's holding up okay with whatever is getting to you lately

They're inventing all new kinds of youtube drama 😭

Where do I buy crypto?

My parents are way more generous with their likes and subscribes than I am, way helping my dad with something on his phone and I just keep on scrolling for at least 5 thumb flicks. I'm more stingy with mine and tend to purge them every so often

My life would improve if I could guzzle down a liter of that iced tea syrup without consequences 🤒

i generally like virtualbox, but vboxmanage is kind of unhinged for having an 800 line help message with pretty much every possible way to use every command with zero text explaining anything lol

must.... post... harder

My mind is racing and tired at the same time

cracking up imagining Waluigi's eagle Mario Golf animation but it just says "I'm gay" instead of eagle at the end

Thunderbolts is peak capeshit for emo adults

23 degrees in my city today when i was growing up this part of the year was rainy and cold

::: spoiler spoiler ::: spoiler upset, negativity, voice dysphoria and self harm urges Listening to some music. New song comes on, absolute banger. Just hitting different. Like an idiot I turn it up all the way and sing like 3 words before hearing my disgusting, horrible, mutilated voice. Mood instantly ruined. Cry. Struggle against the self harm urges. They still haven't gone away and probably won't until tomorrow (fingers crossed).

Shit like this makes me hate being trans. This wouldn't have happened otherwise. I wouldn't hate my voice like this.

Oh, and voice training is just this, but worse by actively trying to listen to myself instead of the opposite (which clearly wasn't enough). For what, hundreds of hours? Of sounding like a mockery of a woman. I can't do it. Want to hurt myself so fucking bad. Why did this happen to me. Probably just going to die mad and dysphoric bc I can't. I never want to speak again. :::

Last day for this mega everyone comment what pokemon you are before someone else claims it I'm partial to Wobbuffet >_<ᕗ

Anyone have experience getting their eyebrows done at the hairdresser, like is it gonna be worse than having them done at a beauty salon? The price is pretty similar (expensive as fuck), and I would prefer my hair stylist do it because I know her and because it's convenient when I'm already there to do my hair anyway, but idk if beauticians are better trained at stuff like that.

I did it a handful of times pre-transition but that was just coloring without shaping, now I want both.

When Mr Red Hot Chili Pepper mentioned the gender of a generation I went so each generation gets exactly one gender

playing lies of pp and it's fun

just beat the scrapped watchman - took a while but i eventually got good at blocking

My style is to worry so much I get a tummy ache and then it usually being a nothing burger. Hope it's a nothing burger since I wanna enjoy my lazy sunday and I can't do anything about it till tomorrow anyway

Finally beat the Amon fights in Yakuza 0 and with that I consider finally done with 0. The Majima's fight was def tougher than Kiryu 's having to fight a suped up version of mad dog style and dragon style was some bullshit not to mention him swapping out your items with tissues and poisoned drinks was annoying, interesting but annoying. Still now I can move on to kiwami 2.

I'll be saying good bye to this old engine 5, 0 and kiwami 1 used to go back to the dragon engine 6, like a dragon and the later games use. Feel meh but hopefully they improved it from 6. Like a dragon didn't get much of a feel for since it was a RPG.

I am stuck at home due to recovering from a non-transition related minor operation. Not too much discomfort, but I have to lay on my side most of the day so all I can really do is text, read and watch TV/movies. Would love film recs, especially ones that give gender feels.

buster skeaton

I think every poster should somewhere title drop their post like in the movies preferably after putting on some shades I know I'd pog pretty hard and soy point

Is transitioning a lifelong process or does it 'end'?

Yakuza dead souls is the 06 of the Yakuza series so that's why I love it. It's got a lot of heart and both sort of non canon because reasons. The day has come people have come around to 06 because of the P-06 and shadow generations so dead souls will have it's day

lately I've been tempted to get a PS5, but I'll think I'll refrain, not because it doesn't have games I'm interested in (it does), but just because it's ugly

Name a more iconic duo than "not being able to figure out why I felt weird and bad all day" and "discovering at 7:30pm that I forgot to take my morning meds"

I love seeing users of this site defend transphobes, it is my favorite.

tonight, I've let the bed bugs bite

Trying to find more info on yakuza dead souls is annoying, wanted to show someone the MJM56-55 Exorcist Majima's exclusive shotgun and it's like all I'm getting is stuff from yakuza 0 and kiwami 1. Even the wiki is lacking on a good image with the blue flames.

Terry Tauliaut and Annabelle - Partner Dance - Salsa Addicted Festival 2019

Been reading some material from Black Dog a subdivision of the old white wolf ttrpg (most know them for vampire the masquerade) mostly wanted to see it since I heard them being pretty edgy/meta so figured why not. Rn reading freak legion and like I'm a chapter in and it's ok, not used to the earlier comic style they had back then. I get it's supposed to be visceral but guess it was a different time.

Filling the DMs with unwanted SEGA game takes that no one asked for the little devil in me keeps tempting me but I stay strong chat.

1000 Eyes, that did half of the Signalis soundtrack, just released an album of alternate versions of tracks from the game

If you can suppress the urge to cringe and instead look onward with wide eyes and a smile that goes to your eyes then you know you're doing your inner child proud.

::: spoiler currently listening to hunter the parenting akira cross, hands down some of the best content I've heard in a while https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdKno0A2Yuk :::

Self Portrait with a Cigarette by Edvard Munch, 1895

Old scans of books from the 90s have such a charm to them, that fuzzy text and image make me feel so cozy as I read

I miss playing shadow reloaded after my first Wii died the second one I had I tried to homebrew but I had issues with it and just kinda stopped. That game was comfort slop even if 1.0 was ballbustingly hard it was goated. Now I remember the update of reloaded used a custom version of nintendont that I could never figure out. Might give it another go later and stick to 1.0 since I hope my progress is still on the GC memory card. I remember I was A ranking it all and it was very difficult with the revised scoring system added

My coworkers were talking about pensions today. They're a little closer to retirement (within the next 10 years). Cause I started later in life, they told me I'd probably be working 30 full years (until I'm well into my 60s). They wondered what I'd do about it all. I told em "does 2055 sound like it'll be good years going forward from that or bad." And that's probably the biggest difference between generations (as real as they are) lol. One hand you have something stable but you had to work for, the other feels like the end of a thread of an unraveling sweater

So this is capeshit, my mom is watching end game and it's the part where the bow guy and Scarlett Johansen have to figure out who's gonna be sacrificed to get the soul stone. Doesn't Bow Guy... have a wife and kids? When it's time to recount the story, is he gonna tell them that he sacrificed the one he loved the most - Scarlett Johansen?