Avoiding important things at work and then making up shit
Love to completely avoid a simple but critical task for weeks only to be reminded that I really need to have it done by now and now I have to make shit up and pretend I'm dumb or lost my notes or my dog ate my laptop, because saying "my brain didn't give a fuck about this particular task for the last month because there was no real deadline and now I'm filled to the brim with anxiety and I want to hide in my bed for three days because now there is one and it was today" is a valid thing in therapy but some how not at work.
Anyway, ADHD sucks and I get knocked down but i get up again and so on.
Didn't know I had an alt, and that I didn't remember posting this.
25
Mardoniush [she/her] - 1.4yr
If you have a good manager saying "I'm sorry, I lost focus on this and it slipped past me. I work better with clear and consistent deadlines and staged check-ins. Can we set these in future so critical tasks don't slip" usually works, because you know what managers (and people who are half decent in general) love? Ways they can help you! Especially when it will benefit them and stop shit coming from upstairs. A good manager wants you to be less anxious and for work not to overload you entirely out of their own self interest.
If you have bad management, no god can help you, but also the lying is more likely to work.
23
fanbois [he/him] - 1.4yr
I do have a mostly competent manager. I will apologize and say something to the likes you said. I will take my meds, breathe and find words and actions that will make this situation acceptable. I appreciate your words in any case.
But the dread of failure and rejection is so deep seated, it physically hurts. I stare at my problem and I know it's transient, it's solvable and it will be okay... And yet my body and soul react to it with a violence that is usually reserved for hearing about events in Gaza or a loved one dying. I have failed a thousend times on similar things and all my brain learned is shame and hiding. I am better now, but it's still like a baseball bat to the gut. It's full on fight or flight, and my body is going 100% flight and leaves the fighting for another day.
3
Moss [they/them] - 1.4yr
"my brain didn't give a fuck about this particular task for the last month because there was no real deadline and now I'm filled to the brim with anxiety and I want to hide in my bed for three days because now there is one and it was today"
So fucking real. If a task isn't due within 48 hours I won't start it, and it it's assigned a long time before it's due, like a month in advance, I think "that's infinite time! I won't ever have to start this because I have infinite time!" And then time is finite and the deadline is upon me and I freak out and hate myself for not doing it earlier
21
Collatz_problem [comrade/them] - 1.4yr
I just invent deadlines for myself.
13
Barabas - 1.4yr
Recently official ADD haver and this struggle is real. I tend to need to build up sufficient anxiety in order to do the boring stuff. Like, I’ll have done 90% of the job and just can’t bring myself to do the final bit of paperwork. I’d probably be less anxious if I didn’t rely on being very anxious to do any amount of paperwork.
Had one of the people higher up in the company tell me that I’d likely be able to raise my wage 20% easy if I just answered even 3/4 of my emails (was off record at a pub). Hopefully the meds will help.
13
AernaLingus [any] - 1.4yr
Like, I’ll have done 90% of the job and just can’t bring myself to do the final bit of paperwork.
Fuck, this is me right now. Usually I do the write-ups for pull requests as I go to prevent this, but this time I forgot, and now I am dreading trying to trawl through my commit history to figure out wtf I actually did.
7
keepcarrot [she/her] - 1.4yr
My most productive paperwork periods are when someone is literally standing next to me telling me what to write down and won't let me leave. So perhaps...
4
Barabas - 1.4yr
This is almost starting to sound like a kink.
But essentially the same, I am a lot more productive whenever I get a trainee to look after.
2
Evilphd666 [he/him, comrade/them] - 1.4yr
You tend not to do things right away. We don't think you plan well.
but they get done and on time right?
Well....yes.
So what's the problem?
Well....you see.....unit morale.
Riiiiiight.
9
Kuori [she/her, pup/pup's] - 1.4yr
"but commissar, what about my morale? "
5
infuziSporg [e/em/eir] - 1.4yr
Thank bog I have a job with no real deadlines. I'd be perpetually stressed if I did, like in high school and college.
4
Blu_Lab [he/him, it/its] - 1.4yr
this has been me with all of my college classes :P im behind in 3/4 of em, and i still can't get myself to do anything when spring break is next week
fanbois in neurodiverse
Avoiding important things at work and then making up shit
Love to completely avoid a simple but critical task for weeks only to be reminded that I really need to have it done by now and now I have to make shit up and pretend I'm dumb or lost my notes or my dog ate my laptop, because saying "my brain didn't give a fuck about this particular task for the last month because there was no real deadline and now I'm filled to the brim with anxiety and I want to hide in my bed for three days because now there is one and it was today" is a valid thing in therapy but some how not at work.
Anyway, ADHD sucks and I get knocked down but i get up again and so on.
Didn't know I had an alt, and that I didn't remember posting this.
If you have a good manager saying "I'm sorry, I lost focus on this and it slipped past me. I work better with clear and consistent deadlines and staged check-ins. Can we set these in future so critical tasks don't slip" usually works, because you know what managers (and people who are half decent in general) love? Ways they can help you! Especially when it will benefit them and stop shit coming from upstairs. A good manager wants you to be less anxious and for work not to overload you entirely out of their own self interest.
If you have bad management, no god can help you, but also the lying is more likely to work.
I do have a mostly competent manager. I will apologize and say something to the likes you said. I will take my meds, breathe and find words and actions that will make this situation acceptable. I appreciate your words in any case.
But the dread of failure and rejection is so deep seated, it physically hurts. I stare at my problem and I know it's transient, it's solvable and it will be okay... And yet my body and soul react to it with a violence that is usually reserved for hearing about events in Gaza or a loved one dying. I have failed a thousend times on similar things and all my brain learned is shame and hiding. I am better now, but it's still like a baseball bat to the gut. It's full on fight or flight, and my body is going 100% flight and leaves the fighting for another day.
So fucking real. If a task isn't due within 48 hours I won't start it, and it it's assigned a long time before it's due, like a month in advance, I think "that's infinite time! I won't ever have to start this because I have infinite time!" And then time is finite and the deadline is upon me and I freak out and hate myself for not doing it earlier
I just invent deadlines for myself.
Recently official ADD haver and this struggle is real. I tend to need to build up sufficient anxiety in order to do the boring stuff. Like, I’ll have done 90% of the job and just can’t bring myself to do the final bit of paperwork. I’d probably be less anxious if I didn’t rely on being very anxious to do any amount of paperwork.
Had one of the people higher up in the company tell me that I’d likely be able to raise my wage 20% easy if I just answered even 3/4 of my emails (was off record at a pub). Hopefully the meds will help.
Fuck, this is me right now. Usually I do the write-ups for pull requests as I go to prevent this, but this time I forgot, and now I am dreading trying to trawl through my commit history to figure out wtf I actually did.
My most productive paperwork periods are when someone is literally standing next to me telling me what to write down and won't let me leave. So perhaps...
This is almost starting to sound like a kink.
But essentially the same, I am a lot more productive whenever I get a trainee to look after.
You tend not to do things right away. We don't think you plan well.
Well....yes.
So what's the problem?
Well....you see.....unit morale.
Riiiiiight.
"but commissar, what about my morale?
"
Thank bog I have a job with no real deadlines. I'd be perpetually stressed if I did, like in high school and college.
this has been me with all of my college classes :P im behind in 3/4 of em, and i still can't get myself to do anything when spring break is next week
i might be a tad cooked