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[Satire] Focusing country’s entire security apparatus on arts students with watermelon earrings really paying off

https://theshovel.com.au/2025/09/03/focusing-countrys-entire-security-apparatus-on-arts-students-with-watermelon-earrings-really-paying-off/

Heads from all branches of Australia’s military and intelligence services have gathered together to celebrate the astronomical successes they’ve had in protecting the country from uni students with watermelon insignias.

A spokesperson for the Department of Home Affairs said the tactic had been “incredibly effective” at ensuring the nation remained safe from anyone holding a placard with glitter glue on it.